12000 May 01
I was in the fraternity house with the other people. There had been some construction on the house. I was in a second-floor room with some other people. The room was large and off-white. It was long east to west and seemed like a bedroom. There were clean decorations around the room. Someone was talking about the construction project. I looked to the east as i headed for the door in the north wall. There was a narrow set of stairs coming down from the ceiling. Someone demonstrated how the stairs pulled down from the attic. I remembered seeing the stairs before. The top part of the stairs was wooden and was the length of the trap door in the ceiling. The lower section was made of white plastic and unfolded as the stairs came down. A few of the brothers watched as the stairs were lowered. I felt uninterested in the construction. I walked to the north, out of the building. I seemed to be in a city area. It was dark outside, and i was facing south as i stood to the west of the large building. The building seemed to be part of a hospital or large apartment building. There was a man with me as i sat on the short cement wall near the outside of the building. I scratched my left thigh through the heavy sweat pants that i was wearing. I noticed that there was a sipper along the middle of the pant leg. The man asked me whether i was still into that style of pants. I remembered that this type of pants was coming back into style. I told him that i actually wore the pants because they were useful for running. I knew that many people were wearing them for fashion, but the multiple zippers were actually useful to me. The man walked around to my right side. There was a pole in front of me which supported a roof above the short wall. The wall seemed to fence in a small section of cement paving near the building. It seemed as though it might be a type of porch. I felt slightly weary of talking to the man. He was wearing a blue running shell. I felt as though i was not really familiar with him and did not totally trust him. Then there were voiced down the street from us, to the north. I was not facing the north as i sat. I heard a woman say “It’s a dragon!” She sounded surprised, but was laughing with her friends. She had found something which had startled her. I wondered what she could be referring to that might be considered a dragon. Two women walked out of the bushes on the west side of the road, from between two of the wooden suburban houses. A small group of men followed them. It seemed as though they had come from a party. I felt uncomfortable watching them. It seemed as though they might interact with me in some way. I wondered what was behind the house that they had thought was a dragon. I felt agitated and wanted to move.
12000 May 02
I was going to fly in a space mission, and i had to get ready. Someone explained to me what would happen. I could see the small space module floating in orbit around Earth. I was supposed to be inside. Someone described that the station would orbit the moon for a few days before a section detached to return us to earth. There would be a waiting period where we would have to conserve air and heat until the capsule made it back into Earth’s orbit. It seemed that we would be waiting on the far side of the moon. I could see the dry grey surface below us. Something felt uncomfortable about the situation. It would take a couple days of floating before we could move home. I wondered what we would do all that time. It seemed dangerous to have to conserve energy all the time. I wondered whether we would be able to talk to each other. I thought that it would be better if we simply slept. I wondered how i would prepare for the mission. It seemed that i was not really ready to go, and i felt nervous. I knew that i was not an astronaut but rather a celebrity. I wondered whether i was fit to go on the mission. There was someone else with me who also seemed to be a celebrity. He seemed like a friend of mine. I wandered to the south, into the large room of the dimly lighted restaurant. I had come before the rest of my relatives. I told the waiter that i would sit at the booth along the east wall. I knew that my relatives would arrive soon. As i started out of the room to the west, i noticed my grandmother and $K2 walked into the room. I hoped that they would notice that i had chosen a table. My grandmother was talking to the head waiter, though, as if she were unaware of me. She was asking for a table. I felt frustrated with her, thinking that she was simply not aware of what was going on around her. $K2 started to walk into the room. He seemed to know that i was there and walked over to the round table in the center of the room where i had reserved seats for my family. The table had a white table cloth on it. My grandmother walked over to the booth against the wall, ignoring others in the room. I felt annoyed and walked to the west. I walked back into the hotel room where my parents had been. I remembered being here before. I thought about the space mission again. I wondered whether it would be agitating to stay in a small capsule for such a long time waiting for the reentry. I then realized that it was only Wednesday. I had thought that the capsule would return home on Friday, but i then started to wonder whether it was really Friday and Saturday that it would be in silence and Sunday that it would return. I felt confused. I was very uncomfortable with the mission. I walked across the dark hotel room. The room had dark grey carpeting on the floor, but did not seem to have any furnishings. There was a door on the east end of the north wall. I opened the door and was on the outside of it. There was a strong wind blowing through the door. I through that the pressure was not equalized both inside and outside the room. I remembered that this had been a problem before. I started to open the door to walk into the room when i remembered that there was a pet bird inside. It seemed to be a large raptor. I had to be careful that it did not fly out as i opened the door. I stepped through the door as the wind blew strongly into the room. I pushed the white door shut, but did not get it to latch. I looked at the edge of the door and could see a thin horizontal slot on the left side of the door frame where the latch would catch. I was not pushing the door far enough into the door frame to catch the latch. The latch was silver and seemed triangular, with multiple pieces. I pushed the door as far as i could until the latch caught. I wondered what it would be like to wait in the shuttle for such a long period of time. It did not seem to make sense to me. I was not an astronaut. I wondered why i had been sent on the mission. I thought that we would have to be careful to save air during the mission. I was uncomfortable thinking about the flight. It seemed like something exciting to do, but there was something wrong with the idea. I felt concern for myself and the other person who was with me. He seemed to be a good friend of mine. I pictured the small space module floating high above a dry orange desert. It seemed like the moon. I knew that we would have to wait for a long time before we could make it back home. Something seemed unreal about the situation. It was as if the memory were very old and outdated.
12000 May 04
It was three in the morning, and i seemed to be at $P19. $F15 was with me in the house. We were talking about something. It had to do with a course at the college. It seemed that i would be able to get in.
I walked to the northwest, along the shore of the lake by the campsite. The lake was calm, and it seemed like early morning. The air was slightly hazy, and there were tall pine trees along the shore of the water. The beach where i was seemed to be made of fine pebbles. I was confused as to where i was supposed to be heading. It seemed that this area was familiar, but i could not remember where i was going. I looked around at the old tree-covered mountains which rose above the trees. I then looked down at the map which i had in my hands. I tried to figure out where i was, but nothing seemed recognizable. The map seemed to have only solid shapes on it. I could not figure out where i was.
I was in the small light-blue room of the small house. The light from outside was dim and diffuse. It seemed like morning. $K19 was with me in the house. She was playing with some toys on the floor near the end of the old green couch. I walked to the other room. I had to find my things. As i walked down the hall, i heard voices. I paused a minute, but could not figure out where they were coming from. I felt nervous as i moved slowly down the hall. I then decided that the voices were coming from the closet in the small bathroom. I walked into the bathroom just as the closet door opened. $A249 walked out of the closet. He seemed surprised to see me, but then i could tell that he was upset. He said that he was leaving, and i knew that he felt uncomfortable here because i had found him in the closet. I felt bad for disturbing him and wished that he did not have to leave. I walked from the room and came into the small parking lot. I was on the side of a short building., I started to walk to the south along the short building. The building seemed old and was dingy. It was made of cement blocks and had a low flat tar roof which hung over the sides of the building by about five decis. The pavement on the side of the building was narrow, as though it were connecting two sections of parking lot. It went down hill to the southwest, the direction in which i was walking. A large truck came up the hill and passed me. It seemed to be having trouble and i watched it as it drove by. I then noticed that it was straying to the outside of the road. I watched it as it rolled into a large roll of tar paper and came to an abrupt stop. There were people walking to the north of me who watched the truck but did not seem to be too concerned. I thought that the others in the building should come running out in a panic, but no one seemed too panicked. I looked back down the hill to the south to see another car coming up the drive. It slowed and stopped at the edge of the short building. It was a small tan car which seemed to be 1980s in style. A turkey ran over the yellow guard rail along the east side of the pavement and disappeared behind the short building. There seemed to be a large grassy field to the east. As i watched, a few more turkeys ran across the road. I wondered where they were heading. It seemed fascinating to me that there were there. I turned to see if anyone else saw, but there was no one near me with whom i could share the experience. I felt a little sad.
I paused as i walked to the north on the suburban road. It seemed cold out and there was snow on either side of the road. I watched the cross-country skiers approach from the west. I stopped in the road to let them cross. I was interested in watching them. I stepped back as they passed me so that i was out of their way. I watched them cross to the open field to the east. I then looked back to the west. This place seemed familiar. There was open fields with short-cut grass all around. There was an old brick building to the west which seemed to be an old factory. A set of rail road tracks crossed in front of me on the road. I seemed to be heading south as i crossed the tracks. I looked to the east to see several tracks spreading out. There was another low factory building to the north of the tracks. I remembered this place from before. I thought that i had visited it in a dream. Then i remembered that it was very much like $P3. A man passed me and asked me a question. I gave him directions to the north. I felt wary of him and knew that he was watching me. I headed to the south, trying to remember how i got to the west side of $P3.
I walked into the store and looked at the rack of magazines to my right. I was facing north, and there seemed to be a counter to the east of me. I noticed that there was a calendar on the top shelf of the magazine rack. It had a bright picture on the front cover of something yellow. It appeared to be a photograph with a black background. I remembered that i had just come to the end of my old calendar because it was not a new month. I thought that i would have to buy a new calendar. I felt annoyed that i would have to do so. I picked up one of the calendars from the top shelf to see which one i would need. I then realized that the calendars all covered more than one month. I felt stupid. I remembered that i simply had to flip my calendar to the next month. I would not have to buy a new one.
12000 May 06
I was on the west side of the mall, walking along the main corridor on the second level. The walls of the mall were white stone and the floor was brightly polished. There seemed to be fake plants dispersed around the mall, which made the place seem more decorative. There was a man on the level below me who was wearing a dark jacket. He seemed confused and was firing a gun at people. I thought that he must be targeting specific individuals, but then realized that he was shooting at anyone that moved near him. I felt safe, as though he could not hit me. I wondered when the police would come to capture him. The incident seemed strange, and i seemed fascinated that it was actually happening here. I walked to the north again. This time i was in the room to the west of the mall’s main corridor. I was getting ready to take a class here. I knew that the man had wandered to the south end of the atrium in the mall and would be captured by the police. He was near the street which ran along the south side of the mall, between the tall white structure of the mall and the tall brick building across the street from it. It seemed that the situation was over, but i kept hearing gun fire. I sat in the lecture room, facing north towards the board. The instructor was gathering his things together to get ready for the lecture. I then heard a few more gun shots. Something seemed wrong. I wondered why the man had not been stopped. I wondered whether i would be in any danger. It did not seem as though the man would be able to shoot me. I stood up and looked to the back of the lecture room. The floor of the room slanted up as it ran to the south. There was another man in the back of the room who seemed curious about the sound of gun fire. We looked at each other for a moment, then started out of the room. I walked to the east from the room, and approached the edge of the balcony from the south. I was still on the second level of the mall. I looked over the edge and saw the man walking down the center of the atrium. He was shooting as people as he went. Everyone was trying to hide from him. I knew that the police were to the east, but they were not doing anything to stop the man. The man then looked up to the balcony where i was and spotted me and some other people. I started to wonder whether he would fire at us. I still did not feel as though he would be able to his us, but i was worried that he might try. The man started shooting again and i decided that i should run behind one of the tall columns in the center of the room. I could hear the gun fire and wondered whether any of the bullets would come onto the balcony. I stepped behind a large round cement column in the center of the floor. Others around me seemed to be hiding behind objects. The man was targeting us, but i knew that he would be captured soon. Something seemed frightening about the situation, even though i knew that i could not be hit. I hurried to the south, away from the balcony. I thought that i should get back to my class. I did not want to miss part of the lecture. I hoped that i was not missing anything that i did not already know. I walked into the back part of the store. I was on the east wall of the store moving south. There was a older man standing behind a large card board box. He seemed interested in me as i approached. He asked me how the things were fastened. I looked down at the items in the box. They had something to do with swimming. The man was holding a rubber strap with a pair of rubber laces that he had removed from one of the boxes. He did not know how to attach the laces so that they held the strap around someone’s head. I told him that he could probably just tie the laces through the small hole in the opposite end of the strap. I then thought that the hole was flexible enough to allow a knot to be forced through so i told the man that he could also knot the laces and then push the knot through the hole. He smiled and hummed in understanding. I felt as though he was trying to attract me. I was uninterested and walked to the back of the store. I had to get back to the class. I turned on the back wall and headed to the west. There was a clerk in the back aisle. I had passed him before when i left the class. He made a comment to me about the class. He seemed to be cleaning up the aisles at the back of the store. I knew that his comment was a joke and continued past him down the corridor at the southwest corner of the store. I then felt something under my right foot and realized that the clerk had moved a few bags of planting dirt in front of the door which led to the back of the store. I pushed the bags aside and opened the small door to the back corridor. I walked into the class room, which was now flat. There were armchairs facing to the east as the teacher lectures. I quickly sat down in my chair, afraid that i had missed part of the lecture that wanted to see. I looked at the board and noticed that the teacher had already talked about how new computer chips are doped. I could see a few functions which described the physics of the doping. There were also several lower-case Ps and Ns on the board which represented the doped holes. I was disappointed that i had missed this part of the lecture. I did not remember it from the last time that i had taken the class. The teacher then asked me whether i had found what i was looking for with the gunman. I was disappointed that i did not get to learn about the doping.
12000 May 07
I walked down the road to the west with $F4 and $F7. I felt as though i were visiting them in an area that they knew about. I felt as though i were in the middle of the country. The road traveled over the shallow rolling hills in front of us. I looked around at the wide fields around us, which seemed to be covered with dry field grass. There was a small structure to the right. I asked $F4 about the area. There seemed to be snow on the ground. I thought that the mid-west must have gotten a lot of snow. As we walked, however, i noticed that the snow was very deep. There were fences on wither side of the road, and the snow piled up against them. The drifts seemed very tall. I thought that it was strange that there should be so much snow this late in the year. I decided that we must be very far from where i come from. I noticed a car coming toward us as we walked. I moved onto the sidewalk which was on the right side of the road. The vehicle was shaped like a small bank truck and was dark grey. It was traveling slowly down the road, but started to skid as it approached us. The truck skidded toward me, so i quickly walked past it. I looked back to see where the others were. I saw $F4 step around the tall grey telephone pole as the truck swerved toward it. He made it past the pole before the truck swerved behind him. $F7 walked towards the front of the truck and then crossed to the outside of the truck. I could not see him as he walked out into the road. I suddenly noticed another car which had come from behind me. It skidded out of control and swerved towards the truck. “Oh God!” i exclaimed as i saw the car skid into the side of the truck. I worried that $F7 was between the two cars. I then saw $F7 walk past the two cars and come toward us. The three of us walked into the building and down the corridor. This place looked familiar. We turned a few corners in the dark building and came to a long corridor which ran north to south. I spotted a few people at the north end of the corridor as we walked toward them. They seemed to live here. $F7 and $F4 turned to the left, into one of the room. I walked into the room and immediately recognized it. This was a place where $A42 has hung out with a band. I wondered suddenly whether people would be smoking marijuana in the room. $F4 turned to the left just as we walked through the door of the apartment. I continued straight into the main room. The room was cleaner than it had been the last time that i was here. The floor was covered with a light green and yellow shag rug. There was a small couch against the west wall and a chair on the south wall. Someone was sitting in the chair and an few other people were on the north side of the room. I remembered that there had been many papers scattered over the room before. It also seemed as though there was a drum set on the east wall. It was much cleaner now. I asked someone a question as i moved to the west. I looked down at something. There seemed to be a small animal in the apartment that i was concerned about. I walked through the doorway and into the other room. Someone said that a piece of the wall had fallen off and hit them in the head as a result of something. I walked into the small white bedroom to see $A246 standing on the other side of a small twin bed. He was still talking about the wall. I looked at the east wall at the head of the bed. The plaster on the wall was crumbling off. I then turned to the north and started to head out of the house. There was a small rabbit in my arms. I had to do something with it. I walked to the back of the house where there was a small car parked in the lot. My grandfather was in the car. I got into the driver’s side of the car. My grandfather was driving as we moved down the road to the south. We came over the hill which had fields on both sides. As we rounded the top of the hill, i could see the muddy river on the other side. I thought that the road must end on another road just before the river. I knew that we would have to travel to the east. I then saw the intersection ahead of us. My father turned the car to the east and we started through the small town. I then started to noticed that the fancy houses of the town had water covering the first floor. I looked to the south as we moved to see an old victorian house with water up to the top of the entrance door. I told my father that the river was flooding. As we drove through the streets of the town, i watched the rouses on the right side of the road. We then turned to the north onto a side street. The house on the corner was another large victorian house, with brown sides and light blue trimming. The front door of the house was closed, but the water seemed to be flowing in through the cracks around the door. I asked my father some question about the flood. Something seemed puzzling about the situation. My grandfather thought that i had made some comment about his driving. He told me to drive. I drove the small car down the road. It skidded on the icy pavement. I thought that there was a lot of snow around us. It seemed strange. We came over a hill as we headed to the west into the small town. The small car skidded from side to side as we passed a police officer. I mentioned to my grandfather that a Gremlin was not the best car to be driving in this weather. I then remembered that my grandfather had this old gremlin a long time ago. I remembered that it was never good in the snow and that he used to put sand bags in the trunk to keep the rear-wheel drive on the ground. I carefully turned the car to the north on the small side street and started up the hill. I was worried that the car would not stay on the road. We were then walking up the hill. Something had happened to the car. My grandfather had taken the cat with him, but i still held onto the small rabbit. Something seemed wrong with the situation. I wondered where the animals had gone.
12000 May 08
I was with my father in the car as we drove back into the city. We had been driving around somewhere. My father turned the car to the left and pulled under the white car port of the large building. There were small busses on the circular drive under the car port which were facing the other direction from us. One was yellow. The building was modern in design and seemed to be an airport. We walked into the front door of the building. It seemed crowded with people. I was waiting with my parents for the next bus to come. We were heading back home. I moved through the crowd, trying to get to the bus. There was a woman sitting on a bench in front of me as i passed through a doorway. I was being carried. I wondered whether it would seem strange to the woman. I seemed to be sitting on a duffel bad that my father was carrying in front of him. We moved to the right, past the woman and walked into the waiting area. I sat on the curb facing north, wondering when the bus would arrive. The place seemed dingy and the walls were a light blue. Several other people were sitting on the curb with us. I thought that i should go do something before the bus came.
12000 May 09
I was in the small white room on the east end of the house. There was a small cardboard box that had been delivered in the mail. I looked over the front of the white box to see a label printed on it. It appeared to be from an official place, but i felt hesitant about opening the box. Something seemed wrong about it. I opened it anyway. There was a small tin lunch box inside. It seemed old and was made of thin tin. The outside of the box was yellow with several pastel shades of brown and green. I opened the box to see that nothing was inside. The inside of the lunch box was white, but had yellow streaks as if something was spilled in it. I felt uncomfortable thought that i was in danger. I suddenly thought that there was no bomb inside of the box, but it still felt dangerous. I then realized that the yellow on the inside of the lunch box could be from a biochemical toxin. I closed the box and left it on the table as i walked to the west, into the other room. There was a woman there who seemed like my mother. I told her that there seemed to be something dangerous about the box. I looked over the label on the cardboard box again. It was white and had large printing in a sans-serif type. It seemed to be an official label from work, but i knew that the contents of the box were dangerous. I told the woman that the things in the box were from Palestine. She asked me how i knew that. I walked back into the small room and lifted the metal vase. It looked like a vary large stein made out of pouter or aluminum. I tried to show my mother that there were labels on the bottom of the items which said that they were made in Palestine. I was trying to convince her that, if the items were from Palestine, then they might contain dangerous chemicals. My mother did not seem convinced that the items were from Pakistan. I lifted one of the other items and looked at the bottom of it. There was a green label on the bottom which had a short word written over a noble lion. I thought that the word was short for Pakistan. I knew that the things were dangerous. I then realized that my lungs in the center of my chest were dry and started to hurt. I worried that there was some dangerous chemical in the lunch box that was seeping into the air. I told my mother that there was a toxic gas leaking from the lunch box, which i was holding in my hands. I places it down on the white counter on the east wall of the room. I hurriedly moved to out of the room to the north. I told my mother that she should call the police. I then remembered that we were on campus and though that the number for the police was slightly different than it was off campus. I told her that it must be mustard gas in the canisters. I held my chest with my right hand as i moved to the north, out of the building. It seemed that many people were being evacuated. I then mentioned that we could not be sure what the toxin was. It could be anthrax or some other viral agent. I did not know for certain that it was mustard gas. I stood in the parking lot to the north of the building. A fireman ran toward me from the east. He was wearing a yellow fire jacket. He asked about the poisons. I told him that they would have to be tested. I was not sure what kind of poisonous gas it was. I then noticed another cardboard delivery box on the ground to the east. I walked over to it. I felt in danger again, but the box seemed to be empty. It was open on the back end. I picked it up and looked at the delivery label. It was not the same box as i had received. I became worried that the danger was wide-spread.
12000 May 12
I was in the small white room with some of the other people. It seemed as though someone was trying to deceive the others in the room. I felt suspicious of the situation. I could not focus well on the room around me, and everything seemed hazy. There was a man standing in front of me and to my right. He was facing the man who was directly in front of me and farther away. The second man was wearing a green military dress uniform. He introduced himself as an admiral. I knew that he was lying, but i felt as though he should get away with the deception. I knew that he would not since it was obvious that he was not an admiral. He was wearing a green button-down shirt with two leafs on the left side of his vertical collar. The first man would know how to read military rank and would not believe that the second man was an admiral. The two leafs signified that he was only a major. I turned to the north and started to walk across the living room of my grandparents’ house on $P12. I suddenly remembered that i had killed $F21 in the kitchen some time ago. I remembered thinking that i would forget about the event over time and was disappointed that it came back into my mind. I remembered that i had a party with $F21 and a few other people. I set up the events so that no one would suspect me of killing her. It seemed very vivid in my mind, and i suddenly wondered why i had killed her. I remembered the expression of shock and horror on her face as i stabbed her with a cooking knife. I hoped that no one would find out what i did. I tried to forget the incident, but, instead, remembered that i had buried the body behind the garage of my parents’ house. I felt nervous thinking about the murder. I had to hide it from others and make sure no one found out about it. Even though it seemed to be a long time ago, it bothered me.
I stood on the slope of the hill, in the middle of the tall orangish grass. The hill sloped steeply down to the north. I watched myself stand on the hill from the northeast. I could see down the hill into the reddish water below. The pond was small and had square edges, as though it were man-made. There seemed to be something just off the shore near where i was standing. I was looking from my own perspective now. I walked closer to the edge of the water, careful not to slip down the large gravel of the slope. The air seemed red, as though it were being illuminated by a red light. I could see the rim of what appeared to be a large barrel just under the surface of the water. It was round, but uneven on top, as though it had been broken or corroded. The water inside of the barrel was boiling. I thought that the entire pond must be very hot. I turned to look up the slope. There was a heavy black pipe running down the slope to the west of me. It was suspended at about my waste level at the bottom of the slope, but ran along the gravel as it climbed the slope. There was a narrow channel cut into the center of the slope just to the east of the pipe. There was tall green grass growing along the upper edged of the hill. I then spotted the large woman walking down the slope. I felt worried for her. She stumbled and rolled down the slope and into the water. I felt tense and wondered what we should do. I ran to the edge of the water and watched as she splashed in the red light. I thought that we should save her, but i knew that it would be dangerous to jump into the hot water. There then seemed to be some type of structure over the submerged tank. It was part of the black pipe. I thought that i might be able to jump to the pipe and hold onto it while pulling the woman from the water. I was afraid to get burned in the water, but i knew that we had to rescue the woman. I was on top of the water and i grabbed for the woman. I suddenly realized that i was getting wet as i reached into the water to pull her out. I thought about the sensation on my hand and realized that the water was not as hot as it looked. It was boiling, but it was not hot enough to burn. I pulled the woman onto the shore and starter to walk to the south. Something had to be done. We were not safe yet. The other person walked up to my right and started to talk to me. He wondered how we would save the ship. I remembered that it was being covered by a small black film. It had something to do with the water. The red light on the water had produced some kind of organism. I walked over to the front of the large space ship. It was Moya, and there was a thin black crust growing over the front of her hull. I passed my left hand over the crust and it broke off into small black cubes. This was not simply a covering of particles; it was organic life. They were reproducing swiftly and were trying to cover the entire ship. I knew that we had to save the ship. If they covered the ship the ship might die. I brushed part of the ship clean, exposing the dull tan metal surface, but the black crystals quickly spread to cover the area again. I kept sweeping them out of the way. I had to keep enough of the ship clean for the ship to survive. I looked at the hood of the dark grey car as i wiped the black carbon-like crystals from its surface. It seemed like an old car from the mid fourties. I realized that i could not keep the surface clear and looked back to the middle of the car. The front window seemed damaged as the black crystals spread over it. The car had been sitting in the junk yard for a long time. I backed away from it, noticing the tall field grass growing around the edges of it. There were rusting pieces of metal sitting on the ground around the car. The gravel ground of the area seemed overgrown with weeds and twisted corroded pieces of scrap metal. I started to walk back to the northeast, to tell Zhaan about the growth covering Moya. I then realized that the corridor between the wall to the east and the old vehicle was very narrow. I would not be able to squeeze past the stacks of junk. I tried to maneuver through the crowded junk yard, trying to slip past the long crooked metal ramp which rose to the south. It seemed to be a gutter of some type that had been pieced together from several pieces of bent metal. I tried to squeeze past it on the east. I had to get back to the others and tell them of Moya. I was having difficulty stepping over the metal debris on the ground. Then the gutter swung from side to side and fell from the roof of the abandoned bus. I wondered whether my father would want it put back up. He had arranged things in this junk yard. I felt frustrated and tried to continue on.
12000 May 13
I walked down the long white hallway to the west. I was in a tall apartment building which had apartments on the south and north side. I felt as though i wanted to do something but did not know what. I heard the music coming from one of the apartments. It was the sound of someone playing guitar. The guitar sound was slightly distorted, and it sounded as though the person playing were playing around with different melodies. They were not that experienced. I knew that it was $F10 playing. I walked to the west until i was in front of the door. The place seemed like a college dorm. The door was covered with a large white poster. The images on the poster were drawn in black and roughly coloured in red, violet, and yellow. The images seemed to be coloured as if in crayon. I knew that it was a poster for a rock band. The music started and stopped several times. Then the woman walked behind me. She asked me a few questions. She seemed to be $A247. I told her that i knew $F10. We spoke for a few minutes. There were others in the hall way as i joked with the woman. I felt as though i knew something about the music that the others did not. I joked about something by speaking in a british accent. I then worried that she might think i was trying to sound like a member of Monty Python. I realized that this area was mostly british and i worried that people might not understand what i was talking about. I still felt as though i knew something that they did not. I seemed familiar with the people in Monty Python, but i did not think that i should tell the people here.
12000 May 15
I was on the south side of the long narrow room. The woman was to the east of me. She was giving birth to a very large snake. It seemed to be a boa. The snake was coming out the center of her abdomen. I then realized that it was my own abdomen. The woman had gotten rid of her snake by giving the birth to me. I looked at the small opening over my solar plexus, which was surrounded by a thick rounded lip. There was a pale yellow puss oozing from the hole as the second snake stuck its head out. I thought that it would just slide out of the hole, but it slid back in. I wanted the snake to come out, but the birth was not going correctly. I was now on the north side of the room. I wondered what i should do. I thought that i would have to have an operation to remove the snake. I could feel it moving around in my abdomen. I then felt my left side with my left hand and noticed that there was a ridge where the body of the snake was. The snake was wrapped around my midsection. It seemed very thin and very close to the surface of my skin. I wanted it to come out. I did not want to have people operate on me. I then thought that an operation might leave a large scar, which i did not like the idea of. I felt the snake on my side, moving my hand near its head, which was in the lower left section of my abdomen. The snake responded my moving its head. I tried to move the head towards the hole, but the snake did not want to move. I then realized that the head of the snake was now very low on my abdomen. I tried to grab the head, but it pulled away. I was worried that it might try to bite me from the inside. I thought about having it removed. I worried that they might have to cut my skin all the way around my body to clean out any infection that the snake might have caused. I felt uncomfortable as i tried to position the head of the snake towards the hole. I then realized that the snake was very low on my left abdomen. It was almost in my groin. I thought that it would not be so bad if the surgeons cut there because the scar would not show. I felt very uncomfortable and wanted the snake out of my body.
12000 May 16
I was in the small library of the building. All of the surfaces seemed dark and the room was dimly lit. Others crowded through the room. I noticed a few books on the shelves that were different from what i was used to. I then noticed a white phonograph cover on the wall. I thought that it was music from Jesus Christ Superstar, but the album did not seem right. It was a white image with various figures drawn in black lines. There seemed to be some colour in the lines, but only hints. I then realized theater the album was not what i thought it was. I looked closer at the title, which was written across the top in stream-lines yellow letters. They appeared to be seventies in style, with long straight lines drawn from the bottoms of each letter as though it were mimicking a neon light. The title of the album was Jesus Christ Super Father. I realized that it must be the muslim version of the play. It had a different meaning in the muslim faith. I then wondered why they had chosen “father” for the title. I thought that it was some reference to god which was important to the religion. I looked more closely at the album. It was very interesting to me. It was not open. The phonograph cover held two phonographs and folded in the middle. I was looking at the inside spread. Each side of the cover was divided into eight rectangles, with four across and two down. The top part of each rectangle was coloured with a solid shade and had the name of a song in the center. The names were printed in very narrow sans serif type which seemed to be dark purple. There was a black-and-white photograph under each of the blocks which depicted a scene from the movie. I realized that all of the coloured boxes in the top row on both pages were yellow. The bottom row of the left side also had some yellow. There were then a few purple blocks and a red block in the bottom row. The yellow blocks were for songs that were in the movie. The red and purple were songs that were used as promotion or extra. I looked at the last two blocks on the right side of the bottom row. They were both yellow. The second to last was called “Tomorrow”. This was the song that took place instead of the crucifixion. Jesus did not die in the play because it was not part of the muslim faith. I was interested to hear what the album sounded like. I started to walked to the west, carrying the album in my arms. I thought that i would take it home and listen to it. I then saw $A212 standing in the center of the main hall of the building. The hall seemed small, but the ceiling seemed high. There were corridors in all four directions. I suddenly felt as though we were coming out of a religious service. $A212 would want to ask me questions about my faith. I felt defensive, thinking that he would be annoyed that i was looking at an alternate version of the musical. I spoke to him.
I was in the main room of the cottage as we were getting ready for bed. I remembered sleeping on the floor of the cottage earlier. It seemed like it was time for bed again, and i walked over to the white blanket that was laying on the floor. I picked up the white blanket along with the sheets, thinking that we should move onto the beds in the next room. $F4 had already walked into the room to the west. I seemed to be on the second floor of $P1’s house. I walked towards the small bedroom on the northwest corner of the house. $F4 was inside. There were two green bed frames which had no mattresses on them. I wondered why we did not move our sleeping stuff there. I suddenly felt as though we were being prevented from sleeping on the beds, as though someone did not want us there. I watched $F4 as he walked towards me. I felt disappointed that we had to sleep on the floor of the living room again. $F4 told me that the beds were uncomfortable because they had a ridge in the center of them. I pictured the green cross bar on the bed and realized that he was probably correct. I thought about the living room of my grandfather’s cottage, which was where we seemed to be sleeping. It seemed late at night, but i felt focused. I was then outside of the cottage, wandering to the northwest. There was an open grassy field to the north of the cottage. I started across the field, noticing that i was able to see where i was going. The light was grey and the sky seemed deep into twilight. There seemed to be a sun under the horizon to the north northwest. I then realized that the sky seemed like morning and not evening. The air seemed hazy, as though a fog had settled overnight. I realized that it must be very early morning. I thought that i had slept on the cottage floor and had simply woken up early. I felt suddenly refreshed as i started to move smoothly over the dry yellow grass of the field. There were small bushes and shrubs starting to grow in the field. It seemed that the field had been growing wild for a few years. As i passed by the snarled branches of the bushes, i started to notice that there were thick green stalks growing among them. I thought that the stalks looked like asparagus. I circled the dark form of a thick leafless bush and looked at the asparagus growing in the grass. I thought that it would be good to bring it in for breakfast. I noticed that several of the stalks had already flowered, though. I wondered whether it was too late in the season to find any young stalks. I decided that there were some, however, and looked through the grass for them. I then heard the sound of voices from the cottage to the south. I looked at the large white farm house in the middle of the field to the south of me. I could hear the voice of a man asking $F4 what he was doing in the cottage. I thought that the people who owned the cottage had returned. I listened to them for a moment as the man spoke to $F4. I collected some of the asparagus sprouts and then headed back for the cottage. I entered from the east side of the building and walked into the large living room. The room had polished wood boards on the walls and floor. $F4 seemed agitated with the other. I acted as though i had not heard the conversation and acted surprised to see the man there. The man slouched on the maroon leather sofa which was on the north side of the west wall of the room, his right arm over the back of the sofa. He was wearing a tank top and seemed somewhat ragged. I rounded the corner of the north wall, which ended near the middle of the living room. On the other side was the kitchen, with a long counter on the north wall. I walked around the corner and spotted a woman in a plain dress. The dress was light brown with no sleeves and looked worn. It seemed as though it used to have a flower print but was now faded. The woman looked hesitant and unhappy. She seemed worn, as though she had worked too hard and felt frustrated with her life. She had long brown hair which was tattered and uneven as it dangled from the tie that she was using to keep it back. I acted polite, as though i did not expect them to be there. $F4 seemed upset that we had been in the cottage when they returned. The man sat on the couch as though he were expecting some answers from us, but i pretended that i was confused by their appearance. I offered the woman some of the asparagus that was in my hand. The man asked when we were leaving. There seemed to be some children in the kitchen with the woman.
12000 May 17
I was on the south side of the road, moving along the driver’s side of the large tractor trailer. It was raining out and the air was foggy. It seemed that the truck was moving very fast down the road, but the scenery was not changing around the truck. I thought that the truck was too far into the left lane of the road and would be a hazard to cars coming the other direction. I then saw the large blue car coming from the other direction. It was headed directly for the truck. I watched as the car stood before the truck. Everything seemed to be moving, but i could see no motion. I was afraid that the two vehicles were going to collide.
I ran to the west along the south side of the house. The house seemed to be only partly finished and had openings in the south wall. My parents were in the east side of the house. I had just left them and was on my way to fix something in the west side. I walked into the small room of the house. It was a bathroom. There was a sink on the north side of the room just across from the entrance. I walked over to it and looked down to see that the sink was a very seem square basin. It had water collecting in the bottom of it. I knew that the water should not be there. I reached down into the water to try to find the drain. I thought that it should be cleared. I noticed that the rest of the room did not seem to be finished. I could see the wooden beams of the walls as i tried to reach to the bottom of the opening. I was worried about the water that was coming into the space. It was bad for the house to have so much water coming in. I stepped back and looked at the area. There was a space to the left of the sink which was open. I looked through the hole in the wall but could not see where the water was coming from. I had to stop the water from flowing in there.
12000 May 19
I lifted the long bow from the coffee table in front of me. It was very large, and i wondered how someone would be able to fire it. I placed it back down on the table. I was sitting on the large green couch in the small room of the house. The room did not seem too clean. There was a dark green and grey shag carpet on the floor. There was a doorway leading out directly across the room from me. I listed the smaller bow from the table. It seemed more like the size of a normal bow. I then decided that the other was an english long bow and was designed to be the length of a person. I pictures someone standing next to it. I lifted the longer bow again. It had a long curved lower half which was dark and seemed to be made out of wood. The top part, though seemed to curve in the opposite direction, projecting in and curving up. It seemed to be made of bone and had ornate carvings on it. I looked closely at the joint between the two sections, admiring the craftsmanship. It seemed like a very old and very fancy bow. I thought that it must be very expensive. I felt special to be able to handle them. I then looked down at the other weapons on the wide red coffee table. There was a large sword on the table. I lifted it up, noticing that it had several blades. It was shaped like a menorah, with several V-shaped branches spreading from the main handle. Each of the branches had a white blade coming from the end of it. All of the blades pointed upward and seemed to be made of ivory or a fine white metal. At the bottom of each blade was a decorative cluster of spikes. I was fascinated with the design. The small girl with long blonde hair, who was to my right, asked me about the swords. I said that she should not touch them as i placed the multi-blade sword back on the table. I told her that they were very special weapons. She did not seem to care and lifted one of the swords from the table. I took the sword from her and started to show her the detail on it, telling her again not to play with them. She seemed angered and reached for some of the weapons out of spite. I pushed her back onto the couch where she could not reach them, but she jumped up and grabbed for one of the bows. I thought that she might break something. I became furious with her and grabbed her by both shoulders. I yelled at her and threw her back onto the couch. I felt very angry, but did not want to hurt her.
12000 May 21
I was in the small house with the rest of my relatives. The house seemed to belong to one of my relatives, and it seemed as though it was somewhere in a warm and sunny climate. I walked through the house to the west. My mother and my grandmother were heading down the narrow entrance corridor to the north. They were leaving the house to go shopping. I felt frustrated. I did not want to go with them. I wanted to do something, but i did not know what. I wandered around the apartment as they left. I felt as though i should leave this place. There was only a little light coming in from the windows on the outer walls of the house. I felt frustrated in this place and wanted to get out. I then realized that this was my house. I realized that i would be in this place for a very long time. I felt distressed and wondered what i should be doing.
I wandered to the south, towards the area where the people were gathered. I seemed to be in a theme park. There was a large swimming pool in the center of all the people. The man who was leading the show mentioned the dolphins, but i could not see any dolphins in the pool. I remembered that there were dolphins in the pool to the south, but the man kept referring to the pool in the center of the crowd. He then told the people that there was an amazing dolphin in the pool to the north. He said that the dolphin could jump really high. He called out commands to the small dolphin in the center pool. As he did, i could see a dolphin jump above the tree line to the north and do flips. I was skeptical. The dolphin did not look real. I thought that it was some kind of mechanism that they were trying to make look like a dolphin. The man called out another command the dolphin jumped up again. On the third jump, the dolphin spun through the air over the crowd. I watched it as it landed in the large pool of water to the southwest. I thought that it was some kind of machine. My father was standing to the south of me as i started walking away from the center pool. There was something that interested me to the south. I thought that i should go to look at the other dolphins. I then wondered whether they could be set free. I thought that it must not be fun for them to be trapped in the park. As i walked to the south, i could see the ocean water receding to the east, thought the short white wrought-iron fence. I wondered whether the gates could be opened so that the dolphins could just swim out to sea. I looked to the west to see that there was a series of gates made of the same black wrought iron. I wanted to open all of them so that the dolphins could get out. Something about this seemed very familiar. I thought that the outside gave might be locked by some electronic device. I wondered what i could do to get the gates open. I did not want to get my feet wet in the out-going tide.
12000 May 22
I walked to the south, away from the shore. It was dark out, but i could see the edge of the water. I was in Connecticut and seemed to be on the ocean. The shore was rocky and the water slightly wavy, though, as if i were on a lake. The shore was covered with thick green forest which had a few scattered houses in it. I remembered walking down the gravel driveway to get to the water. I seemed to be standing in the water looking west, but i knew that i was not getting my feet wet. There was a small boat bobbing in the water to the northwest of me as i moved over the water to the west. I saw the line of stones which stretched from the shore. They were spaced evenly, as though part of a dotted line in the water. Each pile of stone was topped with a few tall trees and thick ground vegetation. The trees seemed to have wide canopies on the top and vines hanging from them. I wondered whether the line of rocks marked the boarder between the two states. I slowly approached the line of rocks, trying to figure out whether they were the state border. There was a strong wind blowing from the south, but i did not seem to feel it as i moved. I then noticed a light grey sign on the northern edge of the rocks. It had white letters. I tried to read them as finally made out the words “STATE LINE” on the top of the sign. I had made it to Massachusetts. I was then on the other side of the state line. There was a town on the shore of the ocean to the north of me. I thought that i should head back to where i started. I walked ashore, wondering if i would be able to cross the state line so easily to get back. I started to feel as though i might not be able to get back to where i came from. I thought of the yellow cottage on the water. I found myself in a small town, with many lights. It seemed like a resort town on the water. I thought that i should turn down the street to the left, but then i realized that it was the wrong direction. I stopped to think which direction i had traveled. I realized that i would have to take a right. I looked down the city street to the left. There did not seem to be any people or cars in the street, but there were many lights on the buildings along the sides. Down the road, i could see a small arching bridge. I thought that it must be the bridge which arches over the small river that divides the two states. I remembered that the river travels down a gorge at the border of the states.
I walked through the department store. I thought that i should buy something to wear. I thought that all of the clothing that i had was out-dated and that it did not match the more modern style. I wondered what i should get. I wandered to the north, into the area of men’s clothing. There was a wall unit to the right as i walked into the men’s area. The clothing that was hanging on the wall was tank and pastel. I remembered that clothing in the eighties had been pastel and thought that the styles were coming back into fashion. I wondered whether i still had any of my old clothing from the eighties. I thought that i could probably wear it again. I turned to the right and walked into an aisle where there were bins of clothing to the east of me. I looked at the clothing in the bin. I then realized that there was a hand written sign above the bins which said that the bins contained “gay” clothing. The cursive handwriting on the signs was in blue magic marker. I felt strange about looking at clothing. I wondered whether anyone would bother me because i was looking at clothing that was designated for homosexuals. I thought that i was simply interested in the styles that they had in the bins. I moved to the left, to the last bin, where there were some bright red pieces of clothing. I lifted them up to see a blue and white striped towel. I thought that this bin actually had some things that i was interested in.
12000 May 27
I walked to the north with $F4. We were on the college campus. I told him that i would meet him in the large quadrangle. I felt as though i knew the way. I had been here before. I continued down the narrow hall. There was someone walking behind me and to my left. I remembered this place from before. It was $P79. The corridor was white and seemed old. The plaster on the walls was clean but uneven. I walked up the darkly stained wooden stairs. The corridor went up for only a short way before it started back down again. I felt as though i were gliding up the stairs. There was someone walking to my left. The man behind us explained how we should start walking down the stairs on the other side. I felt the vibration under my feet as i started to slide over the stairs. I remembered doing this often in this place, but i knew that i had only been to this place a few times before. I reached the bottom of the stairs and continued down the hall. The man behind us seemed to be a police officer. He cautioned us on how to descend the stairs as we came to the doors at the end of the hall. I stepped through the doors and came outside. There was a long set of stone stairs leading down from us. There was a stone roof supported over the stairs by thick round columns. I started to glide down the stairs. The other two people followed me. The man behind me then started to comment on how i was gliding down the stairs. The police officer to my left was trying to slide over the stairs like i was doing. The man behind us then said “What, you think you can fly or something?” I realized that i was able to fly and told him yes. I lifted my arms and started to glide to the left. I was trying to get out from under the stone roof. I crossed in front of the man who had been to my left and then exited the protective roof. The other two were on the street at the bottom of the stairs as i started to glide upward. I felt as though i had to flap my arms to gain height. The man then said that it was not really flying. I knew that he felt that i was putting too much work into it. I then straightened my legs and held them together, stretching my arms wide. I started to rise but only slowly. The two people who were watching me realized that i was able to fly. I felt strange as i concentrated on rising. My body felt relaxed, but i did not remember having to concentrate like this before. The man then said that he did not think that it was a good idea for me to be flying in public like that. I did not care. He said “You think it’s a good idea to let everyone know you can fly?” I felt uncomfortable and drifted to the east. I landed in the street and continued heading north. I remembered that i had to meet up with $F4 somewhere. I looked at the long building that was in front of me as i moved to the east of it. The building was long north to south. I suddenly wondered whether i knew where i was going. It seemed as though i were familiar with the campus, but i was now unsure. I moved to the north along the stone building. The building was grey and seemed to have many pillars along the sides. The building seemed weather worn and had lighter streaks where water had flowed down from the roof. There was a gap in the center of the building which led into the quadrangle on the other side. I walked into the gap and looked at the people gathered on the other side. They seemed to be collecting for something. It was a sunny day outside, and i realized that some of the people were getting ready for a game. There was a hill to the west with a parking lot between it and the building. I could see football players gathering on the hill. I thought that some special game were going to happen. There was someone in the room with me as i looked out the large window. I watched the people outside gather. I then watched the football players to the northwest. They were wearing white shirts which had orange stripes on the sides that resembled the stripes of a tiger. I asked the woman about the stripes. I then realized that the team was from this college, since the mascot of this college was a tiger. There was suddenly a man standing outside of the window to the north. He glanced back at me. I quickly moved inside. I told the woman that i had been seen. I asked her whether anyone would mind that i was in the room with her. She seemed like someone important, as though she were a princess. I knew that i should not have been in the room, but she said that it really did not matter. I walked to the northeast. I was in the large house. There was something that i had to do. I walked to the north side of the house. The details of the house seemed unclear. $F15 was in the hall on the northwest side of the house. I passed him as i came into the bedroom. He was on the way to the shower. I then heard the sound of a bass. I listened for a moment, wondering where it was coming from. It seemed to be below me. I walked back to the south on the east side of the house. I was in the back room of my parents’ house. As i came to the back door, i looked out. I could see a large truck in the neighbours’ driveway. It was a flatbed truck. There were several people gathered on the back around a large polished black grand piano. I thought that they were making the music, but i wondered how a piano could sound like a bass. One of the older girls looked at me as she laughed with the others. I headed back into the house. I was back in the bedroom on the north side of the house. There were two small beds against the north wall. $A52 was in the bed to the east. I walked to the bed on the west and noticed the small black spider that was hovering over it. I looked closely at the spider as it spun a web over the bed. I then remembered that i was in a different part of the country where they had black widow spiders. I wondered whether this was one. It did seem to have a very thick body with large black legs. I could not see the underside of it, but it started to rotate. As it turned around, i could see a red spot on the bottom of the spider. It was a black widow. I told $A52 that there was a black widow on the bed.
12000 May 29
I walked down the white corridor to the south. I was in the large hospital. I rounded a corner to the right and then a second one to the left. There were two young women reclined on stretchers. I recognized one of the women as someone that i had run with. She was short and had a round face and chin-length blonde hair. I said hello to her as i passed. I thought that i should talk to her, but i could not think of anything to say. I was looking for the doctor who had treated me previously. I thought that i should show him my left arm. I remembered that i had a rash on it. The doctor had given me some kind of cream. I turned to the right and headed into the large room. It seemed that i passed the young woman on the stretcher again. I paused in the doorway to the room. There were several young people in the room. I looked to the right to see a young oriental man standing just inside of the doorway with his back to the wall. He had short black hair and a round face. His expression was blank, and it seemed as though he were barely conscious. There seemed to be some wound on the right side of his face, but i could not make out what it was. I then remembered that i was thirsty, but i noticed that the drinking fountain was on the other side of the man. He was standing right next to it. I felt as though i did not want to get a drink with him standing next to it. He seemed infected in some way. I knew that he was injured in the accident, though. I could see the silver tap of the drinking fountain on the white wall near the man. I continued into the room. I had to find the doctor. I looked down and realized that there was a lot of blood on the floor. I then remembered that i was wearing my white socks. I could feel the coldness of the floor through them as i stepped. I tried not to step on the small pieces of red flesh or in the puddles of drying blood as i crossed to the west side of the room. There were several empty stretchers in the room which had blood stains on them. It seemed that the accident had involved a large number of college students. I looked to the south, down the small wing of the L-shaped room. Just then, i heard a nurse calling from behind me. I could see a doctor in a yellow smock helping a student who was sitting on a bed on the east wall of the wing. It was not who i was looking for, so i turned to hurry out of the room. I looked down at the yellowish floor to make sure i was not getting blood on my socks. The nurse scolded me for walking into the room with no shoes on. She said that i could get a needle stick in my foot. I did not see any needles on the floor but stepped quickly out of the room.
There were three other people in the room with me: two men and a woman. One of the men as standing next to the woman, as if helping her with something. The second man was trying to get the first to do something. He help walking up to the first and asking his questions. I thought that he was pestering the first man until the first man did something. The first man was getting frustrated, but did not do as the second man asked. It seemed as though the second man was taking the action as a joke. The second man then started to interact with the young woman. The task had something to do with her. The woman stood as the second man said something to the taller first man, who was not really standing next to the woman. Then the woman was sitting as the second man walked up to the woman again. This time, the first man was standing to the left. I was looking over the shoulder of the first man as he did something with the woman’s dress. The second man walked up to the woman and places his left thumb on the woman’s right nipple. I thought that he was being very forward and wondered how this action was supposed to get the first man to do the task. The second man then moved his thumb up to the woman’s eye as if measuring the distance between her nipple and eye. He did the same thing for the woman’s left side as the woman looked down curiously, her brow pursed in fake worry. I second man then signaled that everything was okay and walked away. I realized that he was determining whether the woman’s breasts were evenly hung. It was to get the first man to do something.