12001 May 01
I looked around at the bare counter tops of the room. They were tan against the light blue of the wall. I realized that i had never really noticed the white and blue of the walls. I realized that my mother had gotten rid of many of the trinkets that she had collected over the years. As i gazed around the room, i thought that it seemed very sparse. It was not like her room. I wondered what had happened. Something must have been wrong with her. I felt uneasy, noticing that there was nothing left on the counter tops or tables but a few needed items. I wondered whether she was sick.
12001 May 03
I looked to the south as the small group of people with me started to move. We had been talking. I started to walk to the north with the others, aware of the orange tennis ball in my left hand. I turned to the north to see the four or five people start jogging away. I was heading with them, but i tossed the tennis ball at them. It was part of the game. An arch of orange tennis balls then flew over my head from behind me, showering on the runners. I thought that it was part of the joke, but i was surprised at the large number of balls that were pouring down. I thought that the runners might get buried.
12001 May 05
I moved down the city street to the east. My mother seemed to be with me. I felt anxious. I was heading to the concert in the large stadium, but i thought that i might be late. I could see the large red curving walls of the stadium ahead of me. There seemed to be many people lining the top row of seats. The crowd was dense in front of me as i approached the stadium. I looked up at the disconnected out wall of the red stone building to see sections of the audience inside. The crowd was large, and i could see people standing around at the edges of the wall. I could also hear music playing. I realized that the show had already started. I did not seem upset, though. I was familiar with the show and thought that i could catch enough of it. I walked into the corridor of the building, glancing at my ticket to see where i was to be seated. The ticket had a letter, two numbers, then a letter. To the south of me was a man in a blue doorman’s uniform. He was taking tickets and guiding people to their seats. He watched me as i looked at the numbers and letters on the wall. Each corridor into the theatre was marked with section letters. Two people walked ahead of me into the corridor near the man. I kept glancing back and forth between the ticket and the white signs with red letters that were painted on the wall. I could not determine which corridor i was supposed to travel down. I started into the corridor which led toward the auditorium. I knew that i was not on this level. I would have to climb up the stairs to the next level to get to my seat. I was late, and would not have a good seat. The two people ahead of me walked to the left, toward the seats on this level of the theatre. I looked at the white stairway which rose from the level below. Over it was a stairway which ascended to the next level. There was a red sign on the stairway with arrows pointing up and down. It mentioned which sections were which. I thought that my ticket matched the one pointing up. I headed up the flight of stairs, thinking that the two people with me would realized where i was going and soon follow. The stairs were really not stairs. It was simply a steep slope made out of a fiberglass material. There were several pipes and electrical conduit running up the slope which people had used as footing. I noticed that there was a dark spot on the middle of the stairs where the white paint had been worn by travel. I came to the upper level and walked into a doorway where the play was being performed. I could see the actors on stage singing. The play was Rent. One of the actors glanced in my direction as i entered the theatre. I was very close to the stage, and i thought that it must be disruptive to the actors. I looked around the small room to see that there were rows of seats on three sides of the performance area. I moved to my left, heading to the east again. I checked my ticket and looked at the row of chairs in front of me. I decided that the empty seat in the row must be mine. There was a bag on it, though. I motioned to the man who was sitting to the right if he could move the bag. He seemed annoyed with the request, but started to move his things. I realized that the seats were actually couches, wide enough for two people. I realized that there was no one in the seat next to me, so i would be able to relax. As i glanced at the ticket, though, i started to feel confused. The numbers on these seats did not match mine after all. I felt confused. I had to get out of the way of the performers and sit down. I turned to the south and started to wander round the large room. There were book shelves along the outside walls of the room, with short book cases running just in front of the walls. This place was normally a library. I came to the south side of the room and looked over the row of wooden folding chairs there. I decided that this was where i was supposed to sit. There were not that many people in this section, though. I looked back to the east. I was on the west side of the stage. The players were lined up in an arch which bowed out into the center of the stage. They were singing one of the slower songs from the play. I remembered that music, but thought that something seemed out of place. I looked to the south again to see the back side of the library. The players had stopped performing. I thought that it must be intermission. As i looked around the room, i felt confused. The room did not seem to be the same shape as it was before. I remembered walking around large square columns to get to the back side of the room, but now the room seemed square. I started to float in the air over the gravel ground on the side of the building. The players came out the front side of the building to start the show again. The audience was sitting in front of them. I moved to the east, to where the audience was sitting. I felt as though i knew something about the show that the other people did not. I recognized the slow song that the cast was singing. One of them seemed to be the main male character from the play. He glanced to the side of the stage as he sang, eyeing me curiously. I realized that the people around me were arguing with each other. They were trying to start a fight. I hovered over the ground, thinking that i should head back through the room to the exit on the north side. I then wondered why the room was so small. I remembered that i had come to a large stadium. I thought that this must be a small room off of the stadium. I started back through the room, but i got confused doing around the corners of the large square columns. I stopped in the middle of one of the corridors and looked to the east. I could see the back wall of the library. It was made of decorative wood. I turned to look to the west, expecting to see the stage. Instead, i saw another section of the library. I wondered where i was. This section of the room did not seem familiar. I thought that i might have taken a wrong turn.
12001 May 06
I looked down at the book that was in my hands. I had to make xerograph copies of the book, but i knew that people would not want me wasting my time doing so. I thought that i would have to do it when no one could see what i was doing. I pulled a large brown leaf out of the book. It was made out of cardboard, with a heavy wire for a stem. It seemed to resemble an oak leaf. I rolled it over in my hands, noticing the small piece of string attached to the bottom. I thought that i could take it to be xerographed first. I placed the book down and turned to the east. I walked out of the classroom and across the hall of the school. The door to my grandmother’s classroom was closed, but i knew that i could get in. I pressed against the large polished wood of the door and stepped inside. The xerograph machine was on the south wall. As i stood in front of the machine, i heard someone coming down the hall. I looked out the door to see a large grey trash can wheel into the doorway. My grandmother then peeked around the corner. She sighed in relief at seeing me in the room. “I wondered how the door got opened.”, she said. I felt uncomfortable being here. She did not seem to be upset that i was using the xerograph machine. I thought that i should show her the leaf i was making copies of. I turned to the north, rolling over onto the top of the machine. I was in the middle bedroom of my parents’ house. As i lay on the couch against the south wall, i called to my grandmother. I then realized that the old woman who was standing near me was not my grandmother, but $K7. I smiled and mentioned that i should not be calling her “grandmother”. I said that i should call her “auntie”. I chuckled about the word for a moment as i pulled the covers back over my body. It seemed that she was taking care of me. I then mentioned her first name again, realizing that it was just a nick name that everyone called her. I mentioned that i was not sure of her real name. She smiled as she leaned over me. Her face was wrinkled and round, and her hair was fluffed out to the sides. She did not look like anyone that i knew. I rolled over onto my back and asked her whether she would go into the other room and get the book for me. I had been reading it. I knew that my grandmother was near, and she would be interested that i was reading The Bible. Without moving, the woman acknowledged me, asking about something. I told her that i could probably name the twelve apostles. I then remembered that my grandmother had wanted me to take a test on the names when i was much younger. It had seemed so hard to remember the names, but i thought that all of the answers were easy to know now. I knew them only because i had been reading The Bible lately. I told her that it was not hard to remember the names of the apostles. I said that the gospels were four of them. I sat up and started to walk away. The old woman was still sitting in the center of the room. I walked to the west, thinking that i had to return to the house. I came to the top of the very steep hill. I could see the young woman with the dog below. The dog seemed like $X6. I thought that i would roll down the hill to the dog. I crouched down and peered over the ridge of the hill. It suddenly seemed very steep below me. The slope was made of white sand, but it dropped steeply away and descended about fifty metres to where the woman was standing with the dog. The dog noticed me on top of the hill and tensed with playful anticipation. I pulled my head back down behind the crest of the hill and then looked up again. The dog was happy to play. All at once, i pushed myself over the edge. I tumbled in slow motion, aware of the movement of my body. My feet rolled over my head. I thought that i should hit the sand with my shoulder and start to roll down the hill. I wondered whether i should turn to the side so that i rolled along the slope. I thought that it might be safer than rolling over my head as i fell. I was still tumbling through the air at the edge of the hill as i considered these things. I pictured myself rolling all the way down to the dog as my feet started to rotate under me again.
12001 May 07
I started to move to the south, down the long corridor of the abandoned factory. There were a few other people with me. There was a solid cement wall to the east, and a cement ceiling only a metre or so above my head. The west wall of the corridor seemed to be open, allowing diffuse sunlight onto the dry dirt floor. My mother was to the south. $Z was with me, and started jogging slowly to the south. We were playing around. I then paused as i noticed that long black cables which stretched along the ceiling. They were made of rubber, and wrapped around metal flywheels. I walked under one of the wheels, examining it carefully as it spun. It seemed to be driven from above. I could se the spokes of the gear which fit into the center of the wheel from the top side. The wheels were spinning very fast, and the cables vibrated slightly as they ran around them. I looked down the length of the rubber cable to see that there were several wheels on the ceiling. They were arranged in rectangular grids, with the black cables connecting them on all four sides. I imagined that the wheels might be dangerous if someone got their fingers caught in them. I started to fly own the corridor, imagining getting a hand caught in the wheel. I thought that the wheel would probably not even be affected; it would jut break the hand. I looked at the south end of the corridor. There was a large piece of plywood covering the center exit. I thought that the place must have closed already. I knew that my mother was trying to leave the store before it closed. As i sped toward the end of the corridor, i realized that i was probably traveling too fast to stop in front of the door. I swerved to the right, knowing that there was an opening behind the large square column which supported the ceiling. I slowed as i approached the door. There was glass over the opening. I wondered what would happen if someone flew into the glass. I decided that it was probably safer to crash through the glass than it was to impact the wood over the door. I stepped to the left, walking behind the wood barricade over the door and entered the hallway outside. I looked to the west to see the aisle of the department store. The store seemed to be a budget store. I could see my mother in the store, pushing a shopping cart toward the registers, which were on the north side of the room. I thought that she was checking out as the store was closing. We had to get out of this place soon.
12001 May 11
I sat on the couch in the back room of my parents’ house. I then heard the sound of the cat crying from the east side of the couch. I remembered that the cat was in a small cage. I asked my mother why the cat was crying. She said that $X5 was in the cage. I stood up and walked around my father, who was seated on the couch to the east of where i was. There was a small metal cage on the bottom shelf of the end table near the couch. I could see $X4 squeezing out the lower corner of the cage. He was most of the way out, but was still howling in distress. I bent over to help him out, telling my mother “That’s not $X5. It’s $X4.” I suddenly wondered where $X5 was. “Where is $X5?”, i asked. I felt suddenly upset, knowing that my mother would not answer. My father felt disturbed and thought that i should not be asking my mother the question, but i asked it again. I started to walk to the south, out of the room, asking her the question again. I knew that she had had $X5 killed. I felt upset, but kept insisting that she tell me. As i came to the exit to the room, i noticed a small puddle of water on the wooden floor. I wondered whether it was from the cats. I walked into the kitchen to get a paper towel. I then realized that the puddle might be from my grandfather. I knew that he was incontinent. I brought a handful of white towels into the back room and dropped them onto the wet spot. They did not seem to be enough. They became quickly saturated, and i thought that i would have to get more.
I drove up the steep road on the side of town. It was dark out, and i felt very impatient. Something felt wrong, and i was upset about it. It seemed that i had been talking to my father’s mother for a time. I remembered that my grandfather was not well, but i could not concentrate on what i was thinking about. I thought that i had to drive the car back up the hill.
12001 May 12
I walked from the road down the north side of the house. The place seemed to be in an old suburban area. As i reached the back of the house, i thought that i lived very near. I looked to the west, into the back yard of the house. There was a wooded hill which led up. I knew that my house was just on the other side of the hill to the south west, only a hundred metres away. I looked back at the blue wooden house near me. It belonged tom someone with whom i worked. I thought that this neighbourhood seemed to have several people who worked at my office. I decided that they must have all come to this place at the same time, and that they just happened to find houses which were close together. A few people came up the driveway from the road and turned to enter the house from the back door. $A300 paused on the back porch. He stood with his arms crossed in front of him, looking to the west for a moment before following the others inside. I stepped up onto the old run-down porch and entered the house. It seemed that the others had just left the room in which i entered. I stood for a moment, listening to the other people in the room talk. I then decided that i should go to the room to the northwest to see where the others were. As i entered the other room, they were just leaving. I thought that i keep missing the people that i know. As the woman in the red and black dress walked in front of me, i realized that $A123 was taking them on a house tour. I thought that i should follow the tour to be with the others. Someone motioned to a small bathroom to the north, on the side of the wide hallway. The bathroom was covered with black and off-white tiles. Someone asked me to take a picture as i approached the door to get a better look. I realized that there was a man taking a shower just to the right of the door. I thought for a moment that the woman wanted a picture of him. I then decided that i should probably take a picture of the left side of the bathroom, catching the shower from the mirror. It would capture the chrome of the sink and the reflection of the shower doors, but not show the man in the shower. I would have to tell the man not to worry about the flash.
12001 May 14
I walked into the back room of the house, where the people were getting ready to leave. I felt slightly angry with them. I then noticed that the top half of a wooden model tugboat was on the floor by the back door. I suddenly felt frustrated and angry. I knew that $A301 was packing her car. I thought that she was taking some of my things as she left. I brought my things back. I placed them in the floor in front of the couch. I then stood up to say something. There were two people sitting on the east side of the couch, talking to a person who was standing in front of them. As i looked to the north, i noticed the figure moving outside the large window, which was over the couch. There was a white horse trotting toward us across a muddy pen. The horse shook its head as though it were upset. I then realized that the horse was heading directly toward us. I thought that it would have to turn before it hit the window, but it was running too fast. All of the sudden, it shattered the large glass window and leapt over the couch. It turned to the west and ran away. I looked out the window to the north to see the men standing near the white barn. I felt concerned about the horse getting out and walked over to them. The woman followed me from the room. I told the men that the horse had broken away from the pen. They did not seem concerned. They chuckled at me, as thought i were being foolish. One of them said that the horse had broken out of its pen several times before. I felt embarrasses for a moment. They made me feel as though i were making a big deal out of nothing. I started to feel hurt and angry with their dismissal of my concerns. One of them then said something else. I snapped back, but i did not say anything sensible. I started to walk back to the southwest. I felt hurt and ridiculed.
12001 May 16
I looked around the small room as the other people walked around. This place was my apartment. I thought that it seemed very small. I started to move to the northwest. I suddenly wished that i had a larger place. I then noticed that there was a room to the west which i did not know about. I realized that this room was near my parents’ house. I remembered that we had placed stuff here a long time ago, but had forgotten about the room. I walked through the center of the long room, to the west. The walls were bare, and i could see the horizontal wooden slats. I pictured the bare wood siding on the outside of the house. The place looked very run down. I then looked to the west. I noticed that there were several shelves which filled the western wall of the room. They were filled with food products. I realized that we had placed the food there quite a few years ago. I thought that it should not be good any more. I looked over the shelf and noticed a blue bag of muffin mix. I thought that might still be good after all these years, but i knew that several of the other packages of food must be spoiled. There was a yellow package on the second shelf from the top which seemed like margarine. I knew that it should be spoiled. I wondered how we could have forgotten about this room for so long. It did not make sense.
I walked to the north across the large grassy are, which seemed like a college quadrangle. I followed the other people past the large stone building, which seemed like $P98. It seemed that there was a large gorge to the north of us. The people in front of me stopped to ask someone a question. We were looking for the books for our class. The man seemed to be a park ranger. He stood to the west of me as the other person stood in front of me and to the east. The ranger asked us how many books we would need. The woman to the east of me answered, saying that we would need sixteen books. She looked at me after she answered, a questioning look on her face. She was looking for confirmation. I told the ranger “I would say that we need thirty to fourty books.” The woman to the east then said that we would need fourty-two. It seemed that we did not know how many books we were looking for. I said “Guess we’re all underestimating.” The ranger turned to the south and started walking back through the large building. The room around us was off-white. I knew that it was part of the library, though there were no books on the walls. I wondered whether we would be able to xerograph the book for our class. The others were walking ahead of me, and i was trying to keep up with them. The group walked to the west, out the front door of the building. $F13 was walking in front of me. He turned to speak with me as he pushed open the large dark-brown door of the building and started down the stairs outside. I felt happy to see him. He then turned to the right and started walking to the north. I started thinking about something, and was not watching where the group had gone. I knew that they were walking to the north, and that $F13 was walking after them. I glanced to the west as i approached the group of people who were standing in front of the building. They were the people from my group. I stopped to the west of them as they say down on the ground. I started to spin in the air. I was partly floating. I lifted one of my legs as i spun around to face the people. As i turned, i noticed that they were staring at me. I looked down at them and realized that they were college students. They were not part of my group. I noticed that one of them was austral. I thought that he was the adult from my group who was austral, but he was not. I suddenly felt embarrassed. I wanted to move on to try to catch the group.
12001 May 18
I was in the back yard of my parents’ house. There were children playing on the grass. There seemed to be some sort of party going on. I remembered this scene from before. It was part of a movie that i had watched. The young boy was an outsider, but he wanted to play with the rest of the children. I remembered that he had been talking to the mysterious boy at the party. It was some sort of suspenseful plot. I watched the young boy run across the yard, weaving through the rest of the children. He did not fit in, but he was trying to play their games. I then noticed the baby that was sitting in the middle of the yard. It was wearing a bonnet. I knew that it was the mysterious child. It smiled wickedly at me as it vanished. I knew that this was part of the tragic ending of the movie. It had something to do with the young boy who never fit in. I felt sad for the young boy. The other children then started calling his name. He had disappeared from the party because no one had been paying attention to him. I called out his name as well. I called “Bobby?”, but no one answered. No one knew to where the boy had disappeared. This seemed almost like a ghost story, but i felt that it was sad as well. I then walked along the north side of the lawn, near an outhouse. I told some off the other people at the party about the sad movie. I then heard the sound of someone moaning. I thought that it might be the boy. He might be trapped in one of the sheds. I called his name, but i did not hear any reply. I then heard the moaning again. I looked down to see a hole in the ground hear the outhouse. The hole was covered with old wooden boards in a cross pattern. I thought that the boards had been there a very long time. This hole was part of the outhouse. I suddenly wondered whether the boy had fallen down the hole. If he had, i knew that he would have ended up in the feces at the bottom of the outhouse. I felt that it was a horrible ending. I called into the hole. I then thought that the boy could not really be in the hole. He had to be with the spirit child. It was part of the movie. He could not still be alive because that was not how the plot was supposed to go. He had to be a ghost.
I was gathering my things in the small bedroom of my parents’ house. $F13 was with me. I spoke to him as i picked up a few of my books and placed them in my bag. I felt sad to talk to him. It was very early in the morning, and i had to get my things ready so that i could get to school. I did not feel like leaving, though. I felt somewhat sick and laid back down on the bed. I then heard the school bus driving up outside. The other children in the room started to get up and head for the bus. I looked out the small window on the front of the house to see a large dump truck driving past the house. It was not the bus that i had heard. Then i noticed that the school bus was coming right behind the truck. I told the children in the room that they would have to hurry. I then said that i would not be going to school today. I did not feel like going. I paced around the small room, collecting some of my things. I felt very sick, but i had to get my things together so that i could get out of this place. I told my father that i did not feel good. He asked me what was the matter. He seemed very concerned.
12001 May 19
I was in the car as my parents drove to the east on the highway. I felt very agitated and did not want to be here. My parents had missed the turn onto $P58. I felt frustrated with them because they did not know where they were going. I had something that i wanted to do, but i was unable to do it with my parents driving. I thought that i would have to make the next turn and head back to here i wanted to go. I was on a bicycle. I turned to the north, trying to head back to $P58, but i was having great difficulty pedaling. The cars moved down the highway past me. It seemed dim out, as though it was near twilight. The ground seemed grey and cold. The traffic around me was very heavy, and i felt uncomfortable on the side of the road. I then glanced down at my bicycle tire and noticed that there was someone right behind me. He was riding very close to me. I turned around to see another man on a bicycle. He was close enough to me that his front tire was rubbing against my rear tire. I stopped my bicycle and turned to look at the boy. His tire was rubbing into mine, making it very hard for me to ride. I told him to move away from me when he rode. I felt angry with him. I felt that he was too stupid to realize what he was doing, which frustrated me. I then realized that the boy’ father was bicycling near him. I wondered whether the older man might b angry with me for yelling at his son. I did not care. I wanted everyone to be out of my way. I got on my bicycle and started to pedal again. It was still very hard to get going.
I stood at the top of the stairs in the small cabin. I could see the people coming into the door of the cabin below. The walls of the building were made of darkly stained bare wood, and the beams of the ceiling were showing. This place seemed very rustic. I looked down at a few of the people who had just entered the door. I recognized them. There was a party going on here, and i thought that it might be some kind of reunion. Someone was then walking up the stairs toward me. I had been sitting with my feet across the stairs and told them that they could not pass. I was joking with them, and tried to act as if i were playing a game. They did not seem amused, though, and walked past me. I felt upset. I did not feel as though i fit in here. I knew that other people were able to make such jokes and no one felt annoyed with them. I then saw some other people coming up the stairs. I put my feet back across the stairs and told them that they could not pass. The man coming up the stairs was $A150. He got upset with me and told me to move my feet. As he walked past me with the woman, he scowled at me. I felt upset again. He stopped at the top of the stairs and said “That’s not a good idea.” He said that he could have fallen backwards. I felt depressed and walked down the stairs. I saw $A86 in the middle of the room. He was talking to some of the people that were gathered. They listened to him with interest. I realized that this was a high school reunion. I tried to look at $A86 through the crowd. I could not tell whether he was in uniform or not. I did not know whether i was wearing the appropriate clothing for this occasion. I felt out of pace here. I turned and walked to the east. I started to wonder whether i was part of the head officers for this function. I felt confused. I could not remember why i had come here. I looked around the room and noticed a group of people sitting on a sofa to the west. They were all talking to each other. I noticed that $F21 was with them. I thought that i was probably supposed to meet her here. She was sitting quietly with the group. She was wearing a yellow dress and had her hair combed back from her face. I then noticed $A6 standing near me. I turned to him and said hello. He smiles and greeted me. He mentioned that his girlfriend would be coming soon. I said “That’s cool.” I could not think of anything better to say. He then asked me why i was not married. I told him that i had simply not found anyone. He asked me why. I said “No reason, really. Things move.” He did not seem to understand my reply and asked me whether it was a philosophical statement. I tried to explain the concept to him, but i knew that words would make it sound ridiculous. I did not know how to explain it without ruining the idea. As i tried to think of what to say, i noticed that $A6 still looked very young. I thought that he looked very attractive. I told him again “It just hasn’t happened. Things just move.” I felt uncomfortable and did not know how to explain myself to him. I then noticed $F21 walking out of the building behind $A6. I quickly said hello to her and diverted attention. I thought that $A6 might find her attractive and stop taking interest in my answers. I was hoping that $A6 might think that she was my girlfriend. It would stop him from asking about marriage. I spoke to $F21 as we moved down the street. I wondered what i should do now. I was having a hard time concentrating. Something was wrong with my thoughts.
12001 May 20
I was heading to the north as i ran down the center of the stream bed. It was bright out, but it seemed cool, as though it were late autumn or early spring. My feet were wet, and i thought that the cushioning in my sneakers was probably ruined by the water. I turned to the right and started to climb over the rocks at the edge of the stream. There was a short dirt cliff on the side of the creek. I could see an old cement building on the top of the cliff. It seemed to be a water station. I grabbed onto the black metal railing which ran along the side of the building and pulled myself up the side of the cliff. The bars of the railing arched from the ground, forming a series of bows which overlapped each other. I leaned against the tan cement wall of the building as i pulled myself over part of the railing. The railing ran from the edge of the building and down the edge of the cliff to the north. As i got above the railing, i noticed that there was a square window in the side of the building. I decided to clime into the window. I thought that i could walk through the building and come out the other side. As i got into the small room, however, i noticed a person on the other side. He was bending over to pick something up. He spotted me and stood up quickly. He was wearing a pair of green overalls. I thought that he was one of the work crew in the plant. I should not have been here, so i told him that i was looking for someone. I turned and wandered down the hall to the east, thinking that the man would let me go. As i started to leave the room, i told the people who were working there that i was looking for George Luptde. I thought about the name as i said it. I was aware of the hard stop which was in the center of the name. They said that they did not know him. One of them then told me that there was someone else by the name of George who worked in the building. I said the name “Luptde” again, emphasizing that i was looking for someone else. I started down the hall again when i noticed a man coming toward me. He was dressed like the others in the plant. I watched him as he came into the room. He was very attractive, and i thought that he had a nice build. He seemed to be somewhat muscular. I noticed the detail in his forearms as he stopped to talk to us. His arms were nicely toned. He was the other George that the men were talking about. I felt suddenly uncomfortable. I thought that i had been found out. They would realize that i was not really looking for anyone, and they would know that i did not belong in the building. I then realized that the others two men who were in the room with me were in trouble. They were being apprehended because of the mix up. The scene changed suddenly, and i saw the two men locked in a stock in the middle of a dirt courtyards. They were being held because they had tried to sneak into the building. There were orange vice grips between the two men which held the upper and lower part off the stock together. There were also vice grips on either end of the stock. The men were being questioned by someone else. He wanted to know how they got into the building and why they came. The view then panned to the right. I could still hear the man asking the prisoners questions as i saw the woman standing against the stone wall of the cell. I realized that she was not really a woman. The man was dressed in a woman’s costume. He had something to do with all of this. This was part of the plot of the movie. It was a mystery film. The scene then changed again. Time had passed, and i could see the two men in a press. There was a man tightening the press. I felt bad for the men, knowing that i was the one who had sneaked into the factory. I then saw some of the people carrying the victims as they walked across the small bridge. I knew that they were taking the men to kill them. I spotted the reporter as the view panned across the bridge. She was watching what had gone on. I knew that she had planned this. She was one of the bad guys in the movie. She then turned and started to run down the street. The street was dark and had a cobblestone surface. I the realized that there was someone else in the movie who was dressed as the woman. Someone was impersonating her. I tried to figure out the plot, but could not figure out what was going on. The woman then stopped under the street light. It was for dramatic effect. The light cast a hard shadow across her face.
We were driving to the west, down the highway. The land around us was flat, but the highway seemed higher than everything else. The sides of the road were covered with green grass which sloped up to meet the road. There seemed to be an intersection near us, with a road looping to the north, under the road i was on. I looked down the slope off the hill from the road to see a group of people at the bottom of the grassy hill. They were all wearing heavy white padding on their bodies, as if getting ready to do something. I thought that they were getting ready for a stunt man test. I walked down the hill toward them, taking interest in what they were doing. They were in a large gymnasium as i approached them. I realized that they were a Tae Kwon Do class. $A253 was running the class. She said that there would be a special demonstration today. I was not on the north side of the class as i watched some of the people getting ready in the white padded suits. I wondered whether the people in the suits were going to spar with $A287. I guessed that the full padded suit meant that they would be doing full-contact sparring. I then noticed one of the stunt men who was getting ready in front of me, pulling on one of his arm pads. He had a very angular face and short straight black hair. I thought that he was rather attractive. I wondered whether i could meet him. He then moved through the crowd. I found him again and watched him as he walked loser to me. I suddenly realized that he was not as attractive as i had thought that he was. His features had changed, though, and i realized that i must bee looking at a different person. I looked back over the crowd and spotted the man whom i had seen before. He was lining up with the others on the north side of the room. I thought that there was something about his presence which seemed very distracting. He was very attractive. The people then started to put on green pads over their white suits. I walked toward the group from the north side of the gymnasium. I had just returned from the lavatory, and i thought that i should join the group. I felt rushed and out of place, as though i did not really want to participate in this event. I saw the class to the south of me, moving in a small block formation as they practiced their skills. I wondered whether it was a fighting form. I did not recognize it. I bowed before i walked toward the group. As i bowed, i started to wonder whether i had bowed when i left the room. I knew that i should have, but i did not remember doing it. I felt as though i was not doing what i was supposed to do here. I felt anxious and confused. I wondered whether i would have to wait until the class finishes before i could reenter. $A253 then looked over at me. I wondered whether she was expecting me to start moving with the group. I thought that i might have to wait for the right moment, but i was not sure what it would be. I started to that i was doing something wrong.
I woke up suddenly and found myself in the middle of the small hotel room. I looked to the left side of the bed for the red digital clock, but i could not see it. I reached out with my right arm, feeling for the top of the clock. I wondered whether it had been turned off or whether the power had gone out. I could not find the clock or the table next to my bed. I woke up and started to feel concerned that something had happened. I realized that there was a woman in the bed next to me. I wondered suddenly whether it was my mother. I started to feel uneasy. There was something wrong with this situation. I stood up and fumbled for the light switch on the wall near the bed. As the light turned on, i could see several plants scattered across the floor of the room. It seemed that someone had wrecked the hotel room. There were several large jade plants smashed on the tan carpet of the room. I did not remember this place from before. There should not have been any plants in the hotel room. I wondered where they had come from. I looked over the debris on the floor and tried to remember what had happened. There were too many things in the hotel room. It seemed that someone had brought extra things in to make the room seem as though it had been wrecked. Everything was scattered over the room so that the room would look messy. There were two beds in the hotel room, both of them with their headboards against the east wall. The small bed to the south seemed too short to really be a bed. I then noticed that it was only part of a bed. There was a second part of the bed on the ground to the north. This was not right. Someone had been manipulating the circumstances. I ran to the window and opened the heavy grey drapes. I wanted to see what time of day it was. I started to wonder whether i had been taken somewhere which was made to look like my hotel room. It was sunny outside, and there was a courtyard just outside of my window. The courtyard was covered with orangish-tan stones, and i thought that it looked different than i had remembered. I was not sure that it had changed, but it did not seem to be the same as the courtyard that i had seen the night before. The large pool in the center of the courtyard had strange green shapes in the center of it. I remembered these shapes from last night. I had been to the pool after dark, but, now that it was light, the green shapes looked like water grass. I did not remember the grass being in the pool last night. I wondered whether it had changed, or whether it had simply looked different in the darkness. I thought, for a moment, that the green might not have seemed like grass in the dark. I then noticed the ocean off to the south. I should not have been near the ocean. This place was not correct. I wondered whether someone was playing a joke on me. I thought they might have moved me in the middle of the night. As i looked at the surrounding area, i noticed that the white cliffs on the opposite shore of the ocean looked familiar. I remembered them from before. The ocean was really a canal which ran down the center of a steep gorge. The stone on the cliff opposite from me was worn and cracked. Just beyond them i could see the rest of the ocean. The cliffs seemed right, but there was something wrong with the ocean and the large passenger boat which was moving from the west. I thought that someone must be trying to deceive me. I felt very unsure about this place. It had very similar features to where i should have been, but it seemed very different. I then heard a voice announce something over a loudspeaker. It said “Panama.” I thought that the voice might have come from the intercom on the passenger ship. I looked over the cliffs near me. There seemed to be several metal beams and metal bars sticking up from the ground. I thought that they must be doing construction on this side of the canal. There was a patchwork pattern along the top of the cliffs in dull red and grey. I thought that it must bee from the construction. The workers had been changing the landscape. I suspected that the change might have been part off the deception. They needed to make a few modifications so that the land looked like where i was supposed to be. I could not tell what was real and what was not. I felt very suspicious of everything i saw. I turned around and started to look around the room again. I could not determine whether it was simply later in the day than i expected it too be or whether i had been moved i the night. Something was wrong here. I then woke up. The room around me was dark. I realized that i had not really been moved to somewhere else. I looked at the clock on the right side of my bed, but i could not see it. The lights had gone out. I wondered whether the clock was really working.
12001 May 21
I looked over the small plastic bags of dried leaves. I could smell the fragrance of the tobacco. As i rolled the bag over in my hands, i noticed that the leaves were pale in colour, and i wondered whether they had lost any flavour with age. I was in my grandmother’s house. The bags of pipe tobacco belonged to my mother’s father. I wondered why my grandmother had kept them after he had died. I started to move to the west, along the street in front of my grandmother’s house. I was driving the large automobile on the street. I had taken it from my grandmother’s garage. It felt strange to drive. I was not used to large vehicles. I wondered whether i could drive it safely. I turned left at the corner and started to the south. I then noticed that the street was covered with heavy snow, which had just fallen. I wondered how the vehicle would handle in the snow. I had to be careful. I drove toward the main street when i realized that i was moving much too fast. I slammed on the brakes. The over-sized car skidded on the road, turning to the right as i tried to steer it around the corner. It skidded sideways into the curb on the south side of the street. I thought that it was not that big a deal to drive on the slippery roads. I circled to the west side of the church and started driving in front of the school. There was snow all around. I thought that it would be fun to skid the car over short distances. The snowplow then passed to my right as it headed north around the circular drive in front of the school. As i rounded the east side of the drive, i noticed that the plow had left a small snow bank on the east side of the circle. The paved foot path came in from the southeast, rounded the circle, then left to the northeast, with a small section that completed the loop on the east side. There was not a bank of snow separating the two ends of the path, but i decided that my car could drive through it. I drove my car quickly over it. I was then aware that someone was watching me. I thought that someone might be mad at me for driving over the snow bank. I felt as though i had done something wrong and i might get caught. I ran to the west and around the front of the church. I walked into the chapel of the church. There was no one else there. I walked to the west, toward the altar. The walls of the church were white and seemed very plain. I noticed a set of large brown wooden cabinets along the north wall of the church. I opened the door of one of the cabinets and looked inside. The cabinet was empty, but i noticed a small coin on the floor. I picked it up, wondering how old it was. I was then aware that there was something still following me. I had some into the church to hide form something. The bad thing was still following me. I knew that it was a shape shifter, so it could be anywhere. I felt frightened as i looked around the church. I thought that it must have sneaked into the church after me. I knew that it would be setting a trap for me. It would disguise itself as something plain and ordinary. I thought that the priest off the church would have to perform an exorcism to remove it from ordinary objects. I started to the east, toward the small alcove off of the main chapel. As i approached the metal railings which separated the side chapel, i noticed a cello sitting on the floor. It was out of place in the church, and i knew that it was the shape shifter. I swung my sword over my head and cut deep into the cello. The creature was still alive, though, and started to move. I had to get help. The monster had to be banished.
12001 May 26
I walked to the northwest, through the forested area. I followed the road as it wound across the open grassy field. The field was mowed, and seemed to be the entrance to a large factory. I knew that i was trying to get to the hiking trails of the area, but they had been redone and hidden behind the new roads. I walked toward the large white building of the factory, thinking that i could get to the dirt hiking trail just on the other side of it. There were people behind me, watching me as i walked. I felt suspicious of them. I looked over the front of the factory. It seemed abandoned. There were pieces of white plastic handing from some of the truck ports. I started down the hill in front of the factory to the parking lot on the northwest side of the building. I had a white metal bracket in my hand. It was shaped like a square, with a wheel on both of the lower corners. The white metal poles which made up either side also extended beyond the top of the square. I jumped onto the frame and started to roll down the hill into the parking lot. I thought that this could be the new spot. I would be the next fad after skateboards and scooters. I rode the frame into the parking lot, where there were tall white stacks of building supplies. I thought that i could skate through the plastic-wrapped stacks. I knew that people were watching me from the east, and i wondered whether they would say that i had to stop.
I walked to the northwest, toward the entrance to the trails. There was a green hill which ran along the western horizon. I remembered that the old trails had been blocked off a long time ago. I walked up the road which ran north to south. There was a smaller road which branched off to the west. I followed it and came to the head of the trail. The dirt trail ran north to south on either side of the road. There were metal fences which covered the entrance to the trail. I thought that the trail had been abandoned for a long time. I looked at the metal bars of the fence which were over the entrance to the trail to the north. There was a sign in the middle of the fence which was red and white. I noticed that the left side of the fence was sagging a little. The metal hinges, which held the gate in place, had broken. I wondered whether we could cut the rest of them and get into the trails. I felt angry that someone had blocked off the trails. My parents were with me. My mother said something as she turned to the south and started to head back. I remembered that the trail to the south led past the old abandoned factory. I told her where it went, thinking that she would not want to take a short cut of which she was uncertain. She would be afraid that we might get lost. I told her that the road went to the old factory. To my surprise, she agreed to take the road. I walked to the south, past the large white building of the factory. We were then walking through one of the corridors of the factory. It seemed like an old hotel. The walls were white and narrow. The place seemed run down. I knew that it had been abandoned for quite some time. We passed through a set of glass doors in the middle of the corridor. We then realized that this corridor did not come out where we had expected. We were walking to the east, and we had to get to the southeast. I looked around that the design of the hallway of the old hotel. This place used to be quite fancy, but had been abandoned for quite some time. Now it seemed cheap. I thought that we would have to find a set of stairs to take us down to the next level. There would bee doors leading into the driveway outside which we could cross to get to the correct building. Me parents stopped in front of me. We had missed a turn. There should have been a set of steps to the south. We turned around and started to head back the way that we had come. As we came to the glass doors again, though, we noticed that the corridor beyond was closed off. There were strips of yellow construction tape across the way. I felt confused. I was pretty sure that we had come from this direction. I wondered how the corridor could have been restricted in such a short time. We turned around again, noticing a stairwell to the south. Its walls were painted light green. I thought that we must have come down the stairs before. My parents started down the stairs, but i thought that something seemed wrong. This was not the way the corridor had been.
I stood on the eastern shore of the large lake. I was throwing rocks into the water. I knew that i had been naming the rocks as i tossed them in. There was some special purpose to naming the rocks. I picked up a small tan stone and tossed it into the water of the river. I then realized that i had put the wrong date on the bottom of the rock. I had mistakenly written the previous year on the rock. I turned and started to climb back up the shore. My mother was near me. I asked her to move so that i could climb where it was easier to get a foothold. I then turned back around to the lake. I had just walked from the large wooden pavilion which was right on the shore. I could see the pink balls which were under the pavilion. I knew that they were really buoys. As i walked back toward the shore of the lake, i realized that the pink balls were floating in a small narrow rectangular pool under the pavilion. There was a young boy with me as i stepped over the wooden rail at the edge of the pavilion and walked over to the pool. I bent over and grabbed one off the large blue styrofoam balls from the pool. I then looked at the situation again. I could not seem to focus on what i was looking at. The blue object was really a person floating in the water off the river. I felt confused. I thought that the person would probably float down stream. I wondered whether i should travel down stream to catch them.
12001 May 28
I walked to the north, following the other people. I tried to picture where i was in my head. The man said that the airplane could take me from the campsite back to the outdoor lodge. I pictured the map in my head. I was somewhere in the center of the state, and i had to get to the camp ground where the others were. I moved my eyes to the east across the map. The outdoor lodge was just north of $P6, on the eastern edge of the state. It was too far away. I had to get a ride just to the campground where the others were. I looked up again to see that i was walking on a stone path. I was following a group of people. The path wound along a shoreline, with empty flower beds on one side and the lake on the other. The woman stopped in front of me. I stopped right behind her, expecting her to move off of the trail so the rest of us could pass. She seemed confused. I started around her on the dirt of the flower bed when she backed away from us and fell into the water. She came up to the surface of the water, a surprised look on her face. She was indian, with long black hair. I bent down to help her up, but she climbed up onto the bath just to the north of where she was. She was wearing a tight green dress. I apologized, asking why she did not simply step onto the dirt to the west of the path. She did not answer. I continued on, following the road to the north, toward the tall rounded mountains in front of us. I thought again about how i was going to get to the camp site. The man said that the small airplane would fly people in trouble directly to the interior lodge. I knew that the lodge was just north of $P6 and thought that it was too far out of the way. I knew that i would have no way to drive all the way back to the center of the forest. I then started to wonder whether i would be able to fly the plane. I felt as though an emergency might happen. I remembered that i had been learning to fly in a small airplane, but i had never taken off or landed. I wondered whether i could do it. I felt very unsure. I looked through the crowd as i passed through the lobby of the visitors’ center. My mother was ahead of me. I wondered how i would get back.
12001 May 30
I walked to the north, through the fancy hotel. $Z walked with me. I had been at the conference in the hotel, but was not wandering away from the rest of the people. I remembered wandering through these rooms before. Everything here was very fancy and decorative. I wandered across a corridor of the hotel and into a room on the north of the building. It was a parlor, with several red leather sitting chairs. The place seemed to be cluttered with antique details, as though it were intended to look like something from the late 1800s. There was a window in the west wall, just above a polished wood table. I noticed that there were several curved brass knives in decorative sheaths on the table. I recognized the design. They sat on a round wooden tray which sat on the table top. There was a boston fern on the back side of the tray, which cascaded over the tray and table with its thick leaves. I told $Z that i recognized the knives. I said that they were turkish knives and that my grandfather had had one. I walked over to the table to look more closely at the knives. The one in the center seemed large, with a black handle and a dark rounded blade. $Z stood to my right. He asked what the knife was made of. As i looked at the blade, it seemed that the knife was created from a chipped piece of black glass. I could see some swirls of colour in the glass, as thought there were a flower pattern in the center of the blade. I thought that the glass looked familiar. I tried to remember where i had seen a black piece of glass before. It seemed like an antique that my father’s mother had owned. I spoke to $Z about the knife as i looked it over.
12001 May 31
My view panned over the area. There was a monster lurking somewhere near us. I knew that this was part of a television show. There were some people talking in front of me. I realized that this was part of an X-Files episode. My view panned from the people to the right, swooping low over a large open area. The area was paved in cement and looked like the courtyard around an urban business building. I could see the monster creeping along the opposite side of the lot. I felt tense. I could make out nothing more than a shadow of the monster. It crept quickly, with a hunch in its spine. In the center of my view, i spotted the Lone Gunmen. They were unconscious and piled in a heap on the flat ground. There was a branching trickle of blood on the forehead of the man with the long blonde hair. I thought that they must be unconscious. I knew that they could not be dead because they were characters from the show. My view panned to the right again. I felt worried that the creature would be near. I then spotted it right in front of me. It looked like a blob, but had a face on the front side of it which was low to the ground. It moved suddenly. The view then closed in on the creature. I could see that it was a robot. There was a row of small doors which suddenly opened and closed. They seemed to be on the creatures foot, as if they were toes. I got closer to the metal teeth that protruded along the rounded end of the monster. They opened again, exposing the bright orange areas underneath. I realized that they were eyes blinking. Someone said something, though, and i realized that they were not really the eyes. They were simply intended to look like eyes. It was part of the creature’s natural defenses. I then noticed the blue areas between the protruding “eyes”. There were small black pupils in the center of each blue spot. The orange decoy eyes then blinked again. The pupils of the eyes shifted to look at me. I was interested in the creature, but still afraid of it.
I walked across the large room. I felt agitated and wanted to leave. The other person was walking out in front of me. I wanted to go somewhere, but the man walked in front of me and asked a question. He said that i would have to study more of the book. I felt frustrated. I held the book in my right hand. I did not want to study anymore. I wanted to go someplace else. The man moved to the east of me, trying to convince me that i needed to learn. I thought that the other woman who just left was probably told to go off and study as well. I remembered that she was considered to be younger. The man in front of me was Dylan Hunt. I remembered that this was not the timeline in which i belonged. He was not aware that i came from a different place. I told him that i had graduated from both high school and college. I reminded him that i came from a different era. I felt angry with him nonetheless. He seemed intent on making me study. I felt tired and wanted to leave.