ZUDEMA

12004 October 01

I walked across the floor of the small bedroom in my parents’ house, heading to the east. I looked at something on the computer screen to the south. I felt uncomfortable and was aware that there was some outside the house. I looked out the window as i approached the eastern wall. I seemed to be on the first floor, and i could see a blue truck moving up the driveway. It was dark out, but i could see the details outside clearly. I knew that it was late at night, and everyone else was asleep. I watched the man in the denim jacket walk down the driveway of the house, moving close to the kitchen door. I tried to stay away from the doors so that he would not be able to see me in the darkness. I was then in the small bedroom on the second floor of the house, looking down at the man from the window. He was peering into the kitchen door. I suddenly realized that the lamp to the north of me was turned on. I felt panicked and reached for the light to turn it off. The man would be able to see me if the light was on. I backed into the room as i watched the man move around in the turn-around area on the eastern side of the driveway. I realized that there were more lights on. I had to turn them off. I could not let the man know that i was here. I walked to the north, into the next room. There was a small lamp on the dresser against the north wall which had been turned on. I thought that it must have been turned on as a consequence of something i did. I turned if off and hoped that there were not too many other lights on. I turned to the north and came into the back room of my parents’ house just as the man started to open the back door. My mother had been in the back room, and she was walking toward the door uncertainly. She seemed surprised and confused by the man’s entrance. I nodded to her, letting her know that i would handle the situation. As the man entered, i greeted him. He was obviously drunk. I thought that we could coax him to leave by confusing him in his drunken state.

12004 October 04

I was pacing around the area. I had come from someplace to the west. This place was not familiar to me, and i felt as though i was either exploring or coming back to this place. I looked to the east to see the dirt street. Across the street from me was an old white shed with no windows. The wood on the outside of the long building was vertical, and the paint on it seemed as though it was faded and peeling off. I was standing under a roof, which seemed to be part of an overhand. I turned back to the west and looked into the kitchen of the large vending booth. The roof over me was the overhang on the front of the booth. The kitchen inside seemed pale green, with old counters and equipment. There was a peninsula counter from the western wall which extended into the southern half of the room. I leaned over the serving counter at the front of the booth and reached for something just to the south of the window. I looked to the south to see an old brown plastic box with a rounded metal flip switch on the lower left corner of the front face. I flipped the switch off. The box was designed like a radio from the early fifties, and i knew that it had something to do with the electronics of the place. Everything was closing down, so i thought that this should be shut off. I felt as though i worked here and it was part of my job to make sure it was turned off. I turned around and continued walking in front of the small sheds in the area. I turned again and looked back into the building where i had seen the kitchen. This time, i was walking to the east across the southern end of the building. I looked north into the dark shed to see the young man sitting on top of a pile of debris. He was angry and was trying to kill himself. It felt threatening, as though he might endanger me by his actions. The shed seemed old and run down. The dry bare-wood boards on the outside of the shed ran horizontally, with thin spaces between them. The inside of the shed seemed dark and dirty, with a dirt floor. The boy was sitting on the pile in the back of the building, to the north, in a small alcove which was only about two metres square. He seemed frantic as he tried to set the pile of wood under him on fire. I felt very uncomfortable. I felt that i was too close to the boy and would get injured if he tried to set himself on fire. The boy’s father walked along the west side of the boy and started pacing in the western side of the room. I backed out of the door and back into the diffuse daylight. I was not comfortable here and felt that the boy would do something with would endanger my life. I had to get away. The father then took out a small round silver canister. I knew that it was a combustible material. He was going to help the boy start the fire. I turned at the door and stared to walk away. I did not want to have anything to do with this. I then felt a cold wet liquid spray across my back. The father had sprayed me with the contents of the can. I felt nervous. It seemed that the father did it as an accident, but it would make it easier for me to catch fire once the boy started his pyre.

12004 October 07

I walked to the east, across the middle bedroom of my parents’ house. It was early in the morning, and i had to collect my things to get to work. I walked from the bed, which was in the middle of the room, against the western wall. I had to get ready for the classes that i was taking. It seemed as though it had been a long time since i had been to class, and i felt somewhat strange about going. I walked to the southern side of the bed and started to gather my things from the bed. I looked through several papers and some textbooks and suddenly started to wonder whether i had done the homework for the classes. I did not remember doing homework for any of my classes. I wondered why i had not been doing it, and then i started to worry that i had missed several of the assignments. I tried to think of which classes i had on which days, but could not get things straight in my head. I looked through one of the manila folders to see if there was any paperwork from my classes in it. Something seemed wrong. I turned to the east and started to the table where by book bag was sitting. It was a small round dark table on the southeastern side of the room. As i reached it, it seemed that i was in a school, with other students walking around the halls near me. I looked through my blue backpack, looking for answers. I then remembered that i actually worked for a living. I no longer took classes. I felt sad that i was not is school any more. I turned to the west and left the room, entering into the hallway of my parents’ house. Just as i stepped through the door, i ran into $A236. He was naked, and i thought that he had just come from the shower. We spoke rather casually. He seemed to be nicely built, and i thought that he was quite attractive. I felt a little self-conscious as i spoke to him. I was holding the sheets which i had just taken off the bed and was about to put in the laundry. I held them over my crotch as i spoke. $A236 paced to the south, down the hall, i followed him, asking him about $A374. There was another man walking in the hall. He greeted us as he passed, and i continued talking to $A236. I thought about wrestling $A236. I knew that he was athletic and enjoyed the sport. I asked $A236 if he had heard from $A374 and if he knew his new address. $A236 told me that $A374 was fine. He said that the address which i had was correct. He then told me the new address as “66 Bloomberg”. I wanted to write down the address, but the small piece of paper i had in my hand already had something written on it. I turned back in to the bedroom and walked to the round wooden table in the center of the room. My book bag was on the table with a messy stack of papers. The papers were my mothers. I looked through them, trying to find a blank piece to write the address on. I shuffled through several things, trying to find a piece of paper to write on. I turned back to the west and held up the remote to change the channel. I then looked back down to the table to the west of me. The table was now a picnic table. The red paint on the thick wood of the table was chipping and worn. I placed something back on the table, between the two people sitting on either side of me. I then looked back up to the television and changed the channel. I was still searching for something. I paused for a moment to look around at the family near me. I seemed to be in an old factory. The walls of the room were dull green and dingy, and they seemed to be made of cement. The greenish fluorescent lights made everything in the lunch room seem sick and old. There was a large glass window which took up most of the wall to the west, separating the room from the hallway beyond. The television was hanging from the ceiling just in front of the window, slightly to the north of the center of the room. It was a black television, with a small screen. I looked around at the people near me all of the sudden. Some of them were staring at me as i tried to change the channels, shifting position to use the remote around a man who was standing up at the next table to the west. The women across from me had their thick black hair braided and wrapped up on their heads. They stared at me skeptically, as though they thought i was strange. I felt suddenly out of place here. I did not belong here. I turned my attention back to the television and tried to change the channel again, but i did not feel comfortable here anymore. I felt as though i might be interrupting the family picnic here. The man in front of me then turned around to face me. He did not like me standing behind him. I decided that i should leave and started walking to the north. I rounded the northern end of the table and headed west. I had to leave this place. I felt depressed.

12004 October 11

I walked to the west, into the small building. The land around us seemed to be sandy, and the sky was dark grey. There was a storm coming, and i did not feel sure about being here. The building was very small, and there seemed to be one room inside. The horizontal slats of wood on the walls of the room were tan, with large double-paned windows among them. The large window on the southern wall seemed to face out to the sea. It was getting cold, and i knew that a large storm was coming. I stopped just inside the door and looked around the room at the others. The wood floor along the eastern, western, and northern sides of the room was raised about a metre above the center of the floor. There were several young people sitting down in the center of the room. The man below me was wearing an untucked white long-sleeve button-up shirt and was slouched into the white couch which was against the raised level of the floor on the northern wall. He had his left arm resting on the elevated level of floor which turned along the eastern wall. These people seemed young. I was worried about the approaching storm, and i did not think that this place was a safe house to be in when the storm came. I also felt unwelcome here, as though i did not belong with these people. I walked to the west, worried about being here.

12004 October 12

I was walking to the south, down the wide street toward the cement deck bridge. The land around me was flat, with few trees and thick green grass. There seemed to be a city to the north and a road heading off to the west. It seemed that the road to the south ended just across the bridge on another road. It was dark out, but i could see all of the details in the land near me. I walked to the southwest, heading onto the grass at the corner of the intersection. I felt as though i should have been doing something. I started to do something with the pile of things in front of me. The pile seemed to be made of wood, and i was setting it on fire. I felt, for a moment, that i was doing something i should not be doing, but then i decided that i should have a fire here. I moved the large pine tree onto the fire and watched the flames grow. There was someone else near me at the time. The person seemed to be walking around me, to the north. It was very dark now, and i could only see the orange flames of the fire i was burning. The small pine tree burned quickly in the fire, and i thought it did so because of the sap in it. I backed away from the fire, heading to the northeast. I was aware of someone coming down the road from the south. There seemed to be a river under the bridge to the south of me now. I thought that the police might come to investigate the fire. I started to fly away. I flew to the east, but found myself on the ground soon after. I was talking to someone at the gas station on the south side of the main road from town. This road seemed to be $P128 on the south side of $P14. I felt confused and did not know what to do. It seemed that i was trying to focus on something, but was unable to. I glanced to the west as i spoke to the person, listening to the sound of an airplane overhead. I could see lights of the houses on the tall steep hill to the north. I then saw the lights of the airplane moving over the town, traveling from south to north. The air was hazy, making the lights seem orange and fuzzy as they passed overhead. I said something to $Z, who was standing to the east of me. I felt that there might be something wrong with the plane, but i tried not to worry about it crashing into any buildings. I then heard the plane hit the side of the hill to the north, near the radio tower. I was floating in the air again, thinking that i should do something to help. $Z said something from below me. I looked to the west. On the far side of town, to the west, i could see a tall tan rock cliff. The steep mountains seemed to surround the small town. There was someone climbing on the cliffs. I knew that he was in trouble, and i knew that he was a friend of mine. There was a spotlight shining on him from somewhere in the city. He had been climbing and was having trouble getting down. I looked to the north, at the steep hills where the airplane had crashed. There were several spotlights illuminating the vertically striated tan rock of the steep cliff. The cliff was recessed into the side of the steep range, with two small branches of the mountain curving around the edges of the cliff on either side. I could see something hanging from the top of the cliff, and i knew that it was the airplane. $Z, who was now under me, on the ground, was shining a bright spot light at the cliff and the person hanging in the center of the cliff. I could not decide whether i should help my friend to the west, or help with the airplane crash. I suddenly decided that i should fly to help the airplane. I started moving my arms as if swimming through the air. It was hard at first to get moving. I would have to get my momentum up. Even though i could see the detail of the cliff clearly, i knew that it was quite a distance, and i wondered whether help would already have arrived at the site of the airplane crash by the time i got there. I felt as though it might take forever to get there. I was then before the cliff, looking at the object in the center of the upper part of the cliff. I could see a man climbing near the top of the cliff as i hovered close to the rocks, just to the west of the man. The striations in the rock seemed jagged close up, and the cast dark shadows in the spotlights. I landed at the top of the cliff, where there was a wide office building. The building was grey and seemed to be faced with grey metal. A wide terrace stretched out across the top of the cliff, under the glass overhang of the modern office building. The floor of the terrace was paved with grey polished-stone tiles which matched the shading on the rest of the building. A small balcony stretched over the cliff, with white metal railings around it. The person who had been climbing up the cliff pulled himself over the edge of the balcony and started walking to the north, across the terrace to the wall of glass windows on the exterior of the building. I walked to the north, heading toward the narrow flight of stairs which ascended up into the building. I spoke to someone as i moved, talking about the accident. As i headed up the stairs, it seemed that i was on an escalator.

I picked up some of the papers from the ground as i moved slowly across the grassy field, heading to the south. The grass was tall, but matted down by the weather. There were thick patches of damp trees all around. The sky seemed grey. I picked up a large brown document folder and looked inside to see what was in it. There were only a few small scraps of paper left. The rest had fallen out. I noticed several other brown folders on the ground, as well as some backpacks. I thought that this was the remains of an airplane crash. The papers were from the passengers, and the backpacks were all that was left of the luggage. I headed to the south, looking through more of the debris from the airplane. There now seemed to be some pieces of metal scattered among the bundles of torn luggage and business papers. This field seemed to be the field to the south of my parents’ house, but i felt that i owned this land. It seemed to be in the back of my house as well. I rounded a bush and came to an area where there were many bags. There was a red nylon duffle bag just to the southeast of me, resting on a large torn piece of sheet metal. Just below me was a smaller black backpack. I looked into the open top of the backpack and saw a crushed box of crayons. This bag must have belonged to a child. I felt uneasy here, and started to think that i should start collecting things from the ground. I wondered whether i could keep some of the interesting items that i found. I then realized that it would be illegal to remove anything from the crash site. Still, i wondered if anyone would notice that things were missing. I then thought that these things belonged to the victims of the crash and should not be disturbed. I then noticed a large black bag sitting on the ground. It was open at the top, and i could see that it was filled with pieces of scrap metal. I wondered what i should do here and turned to the west. I started circling to the south, rounding the large bush, which was really a large green tent. The tent seemed to have been pushed over by some falling debris. I then wondered where the main wreckage of the airplane was. I knew that it was a small plane, but i did not see any damage which could have been the maid body of the aircraft. I thought that someone must have removed the wreckage of the plane, thinking that they did so in order to hide some evidence. I looked over the green tent, which was to the southeast of me. It was a simple triangular tent with a supporting pole across the top. There was some damage to the thin nylon fabric on the northern side. I looked around, wondering where they had taken the pieces of the airplane. There seemed to be a large barn to the southwest of me, but i could not see it. I then started to hear a buzzing coming from the southeast. I wondered whether another plane was coming, but then i realized that the buzzing was too high pitched to be an airplane. I looked to the east to see a small remote-controlled airplane heading toward me. It was a white plane with red designs on its wings. I felt suddenly unsafe here. I did not want anyone to know that i was in the field where the crash had occurred. I felt that they would arrest me for knowing what happened. I quickly ducked under the vinyl cover which was the tent, hoping that the airplane would not get a good enough image of me. I crouched low to the ground so that the airplane did not hit me as it passed close overhead. I heard it pass over my head, but realized that it landed on the ground just to the west of me. I peeked out from under the tarp to see the nose of the small airplane right in front of me. It knew that i was there, and it was waiting for me to come out from under the tarp. I could not let it seem my face, but i did not know how to get out. I then moved the tarp so that it covered the airplane, trapping the camera under the tarp and leaving me on the outside. I had to block the camera on the top of the airplane so that it never faced me. I stood up, picking up the small airplane with me. It was dark now, and i could not quite see what i was holding in my hand. I knew that the green cloth still covered the thin airplane. I felt around in the sheet at the features of the airplane, noticing that the tail of the small craft was loose. I felt suddenly worried that i had broken the airplane. I then decided that the children who were controlling the airplane could still see me in the camera. I removed the cover and looked at the airplane. It did not seem too damaged, but i knew that i had interfered with its flight. The small black camera on the tail of the airplane started to flip over to get a look at me, but i turned the plain so that the camera was not facing me. I was now standing in the dining room of my parents’ house. It seemed light outside, but i did not have the lights on in the house. I thought that it was late at night, and i did not want anyone outside to know that i was here. I walked to the east and set the airplane down on the floor in front of the front door. I had to make it look as though the airplane was here by accident. I thought that if i left it on the wooden floor of the dining room, near the front door, that it would be able to take off by itself. I quickly closed the front door of the house behind the airplane so that it could not turn around to see who had been in the house. I then hurried to the west, into the other side of the house is case anyone tried to look into the house where the airplane had been. I paced into the den of my parents’ house, looking around at the furnishings in the room. The room seemed to be crowded with old furnishings. It now seemed light outside, but it was still very dark in the room that i was in. I realized that my mother had hung heavy red drapes over the windows which blocked out all the light. The curtains were open, but they were still blocking most of the light from outside. I paced back into the front room, noticing that the same red curtains had been hung there as well. I turned to the east and left the room, noticing the large blue books which were set on the table just to the north of the exit door. As i reached the hallway, i heard something. I stopped to listen, thinking that there were voices coming from outside the house. I thought that someone had come about the airplane, and i felt nervous. I was on the second floor of the house when i heard the knock on the front door. I did not want to answer the door because i did not want the people who owned the airplane to know that i was home. I wondered whether i could sneak out onto the roof of the house and look down over the front walk to see who was at the door. I looked out the front window of the house, but could not see anyone below me on the lawn. I stepped back to the north a little and looked out the eastern window, which looked down along the southern side of the eastern section of the house. I could not see anyone. I then decided that i should simply go to the door. I could pretend that i did not know anything about the airplane. As i turned to the east, to head into the other side of the house, i realized that i was still wearing my housecoat. I stopped and turned back. I should head up to my bedroom and change into sweatpants. I thought that they would look more presentable than the housecoat. I felt hurried.

12004 October 14

I came to the end of the sloped brick walkway which led out of $P40 and turned to the west, onto the sidewalk. I was carrying the small cardboard box in my arms. I walked about twenty metres down the sidewalk on the south side of the road before i stopped near my car. I was taking my things from my office in $P40. I held a glass wine carafe in my right hand, on top of the stack of thin brown folders. I also held a glass pitcher in my right hand. I felt as though i was carrying a lot of things. I bent over to put some of the items down so that i could open by can when i noticed that there were other things on the ground. I looked at the pile of white office paper which was on the ground near the rear of my car, and i realized that they were my old papers. I must have left them here before. I bent over and tried to collect them. I felt that i had to get all of my things together before it was too late. As i tried to pick up the rest of the stuff, however, i realized that there were still more things of mine on the side of the road. I had to pick them all up and take them somewhere safe, but i could not grab them all at once. I started to feel overwhelmed, and i wondered what i was going to do. I tried to pick up as much as possible, but there seemed to be more and more stuff on the side of the road. I then realized that a large green garbage truck had just turned the corner to the west and was coming in my direction. I felt frustrated and helpless. I could not lose any of my things.

12004 October 16

I pulled the car into the circular driveway to the south of the main road. The southern end of the driveway was covered by a thin white roof which extended from the hospital. There was a security gate at the entrance to the hospital, but i continued past it, into the long hall of the building. I felt that i was sneaking into the building where i should not be, but i had to do something inside, and i did not feel that i should be denied entrance. I walked to the west, down the long white corridor. We turned the corner and were suddenly heading back to the east. I was with someone who seemed like $Z. I thought that we had to get out of this place, but i was unsure how we were going to get past the security. I came to a glass door at the end of the corridor which had a small sign standing in front of it. The sign said that we would have to wait until after 5 pm. I felt frustrated. It was just another rule to keep us in the hospital. I tried to open the glass door, but realized that it was locked. It would not be open until later. I wondered what to do as i spoke to $Z. We turned around and headed to the west, down the long white corridor. I remembered that there might be emergency exits on the southwest corner of the building. This place seemed a little like $P40, but i felt that it was still a hospital or medical center. As we passed a few open doors, i was aware that someone to the south had spotted us walking down the corridor. I hoped that they would not care that we were there, but one of the nurses stepped out into the hall and called us back to her. I did not want to go, but i turned around to look at her. She was wearing a short white nursing dress with a white nursing hat. Suddenly, some people stepped out of a door on the north side of the corridor, between the nurse and where we were standing. They turned in our direction, but stopped abruptly when they realized that we were standing there. They were $F42 and $F46. They had not noticed us as they were exiting the room, and $F42 had been talking about his disease. I said hello to him, and asked him how he was. I felt suddenly concerned that he was seriously sick. He was wearing a blue hospital as we started to walk to the east again, back down the corridor. I tried to speak to $F42, but he did not respond. I wondered what i could do for him. We exited the building and turned to the southeast, walking along the side of the building. $F42’s car was parked in the small parking lot which was next to the building. There seemed to be a driveway running to the southwest, which i thought led to them main road. The hospital was a tall white building. There was another tall white building to the northeast, along the other edge of the driveway. There was a gap between the building and the driveway, however, and i felt that the driveway was actually elevated several floors above the ground. We were actually on the upper level of a parking garage near the hospital. I looked at the dark blue car which was parked near the hospital. It was $F42’s car, and it was badly damaged. The tail of the car was crumbled, and there was a long indent down the driver’s side. I felt that someone had attacked him, that the damage was not accidental. I worried about him more and tried to think of something that i could do for him. As i walked around the end of the car, i looked at the tan platform on which the car was sitting. The platform was some kind of trailer, but it had plain flat sides which reached almost all the way to the ground. Someone must have towed the car here.

I was in my grandfather’s house at $P12. The house had been refinished since i had been here last, and it looked very new. I stood in the dining room, facing west, toward the kitchen. The room seemed to be mostly empty of furnishings, yet it seemed that there was someone living here. The wood floor was polished, and there seemed to me several things hanging on the wall to the north. I was looking for something here, but i could not remember where it was. I felt as though i had left something in this house. I seemed to be looking for something to the north, as though there was a new room off of the dining room, to the north. As stepped on one of the boards of the floor, i noticed that the floor moved slightly. I was startled and stared at the floor. Some of the boards seemed loose and were undulating as i moved. I noticed, however, that the boards were moving in a different rhythm than i was moving. I stopped stepping on the floor and watched the boards to see if i was making them move. The boards stopped for a moment, but then started lifting again. It looked as though there was something under the floor which was pushing up on a section of the boards. I then remembered that there were workmen in the front yard of the house and i wondered if they were affecting something under the floor. There were wires which ran across the front yard, and i thought that the workmen might be working on them. If they were accidentally pulling on the wires, they could be pulling the wires all the way through the basement. I wondered if the main power wires were attached to the underside of the floor. I ran down to the basement of the house and looked around for the large wires which might run outside. As i reached the basement, however, i realized that it was very clean and new. It had been refinished, and there were no longer any open beams in the ceiling or walls. I looked around, feeling that this place had been changes so much that i did not recognize it. I then started to wonder why i was here. My grandfather had not lived in this house for a very long time. I remembered that i kept coming back to this place in my dreams, and i tried to remember why. I thought that this place was so different from what i remember that i should not be here any more. I was now back on the first floor of the house, looking out into the front yard. There was a very large maple tree with wide branches in the center of the yard. I did not remember it there before, but it seemed very old. Something was out of place here. This was not my place anymore, and i could not figure out why i keep coming back here. I should not be here.

12004 October 18

I flew to the west, down the slope of the grassy quadrangle of the college campus. It was a bright sunny day, and all of the colours seemed rich. I flew over a paved walkway where some of the students were walking. Just ahead of me, and to the south of the walkway, there was a tall wide tree in the center of the lawn. Its branches hung like a willow, but it seemed tall and firm, like a maple or an oak. I started to feel that there was someone watching me fly, and i knew that he would be suspicious of my abilities, so i turned into the tree, hoping to obscure my flight with the branches. I passed through the long thick branches of the tree and descended to the ground just on the other side. I moved quickly to the large building which was just to the south of me. The building was made of grey stone and had tall archways in the center of it. I walked through the archway and into the library. I knew that the people were still watching me, so i had to act like i was one of the students in the library. I then realized that the men following me might think that i was simply heading through the library to the courtyard on the other side. I decided that i would turn around and head back out the door in which i came. I turned to the east and started walking across the front of the library toward one of the areas where students would gather. I thought that i could lose these people in the crowds. I was aware that the man was still following me, so i tried to walk fast. I turned quickly to the south again and walked through the large stone building, which seemed very much like the library. This building was the student center. I knew that the man would have a hard time following me in the crowd of students. I was then looking down on the building, watching myself walk into the front archway. On the other side of the building, i could see a small terrace which was enclosed on three sides by old gothic buildings. To the west, the terrace ended in a short wall which looked out over the steep slope of the college campus. The ground of the terrace was paved with square grey and white stones. The grey stones formed a grid pattern, with the smaller white stones inset into the pattern at a fourty-five-degree angle, at the corners of the grey stones. I saw myself walk out of the building, onto the terrace and turn quickly to the east. I flew into the air and sailed back over the roof of the building. I thought that the man would not be able to follow me quickly enough to see where i had gone.

I was cleaning the small crowded apartment when the telephone rang. I picked up the handle of the rotary telephone and said hello. Someone spoke on the other end. It sounded like $F39, but i did not think that it was her. The woman asked for Beth. There was no one named Beth living here. I felt as though this was a prank call, so i hung up the telephone. I started cleaning again, aware that my grandmother was also in the apartment with me. She was watching me from the other room. She was interested in what i was doing and wanted to know whom i was talking to on the telephone. I continued to clean, pretending that i did not know what my grandmother wanted to ask me.

12004 October 19

I was wandering through the urban area with the other people, who seemed to be from my high school. All of them seemed very familiar to me, but i felt slightly out of place with them. It seemed as though it had been a very long time since i was in high school, so i wondered why i was back with them. I felt as though i really did not know them that well. As we walked, i realized that many of them were the troublemakers in my school. I wondered why i was hanging with the “bad boys”. As we walked to the south, through a narrow alley, the sky seemed very clear and sunny. The short man to the right of me turned to talk, stepping backward as we moved toward the open field at the end of the corridor. He seemed a lot like $A255. He turned back to walk forward, continuing to talk with me. We seemed to be near a park, and we were looking for someplace to do something. The short man turned to talk to me again. He seemed very interesting to me. He had curly hair which stuck out from the sides of his head. As we approached the end of the buildings, $A35 rounded the corner ahead of us. The short man backed into $A35. $A35 seemed annoyed, and simply stepped around the short man and continued on as though he did not want to bother with the rest of us. I said hello to him as he passed. He greeted me with a smile, but continued walking. At the end of the corridor, we rounded the building and started heading west, across the grassy field. There was still a white fence to the north of us which seemed to be a chain-link fence around a baseball diamond. At the end of the fence, there seemed to be a tall fence in the corner of the area where home plate would be. There was a set of bleachers to the south of the corner which faced east, onto another sports field. I turned to the north and stared along the western side of the fenced in area. There were people playing sports all around us. A smaller fenced-in field was to the northwest of me, forming a narrow corridor of grass between it and the field to the east of me. We were looking for a place to play our sport, but all of the grassy areas seemed to be taken. The baseball diamond to the east had people in it. I thought that the people playing on the fields were not from this area. They seemed to be foreigners. The baseball diamond seemed very small now, and the people playing in it seemed to be Middle Eastern. I looked ahead of me, to the north, at the small square patch of grass where some men were playing a sport on small unicycles. There was no place for us to go for our sport. I felt frustrated and disappointed. I looked to the east again to see that the foreigners were sitting around a long white table. They were here with their families to watch the sports taking place just to the north. The others with me watched the crowd for a few minutes, unable to play sports. I wandered to the north a little to get a better look at the sport that the others were playing. I felt interested in what was going on here. I was now under a large white heavy-nylon tent. There were people sitting at picnic tables to the southwest and west of, and there were people sitting in chairs to the east. The people to the north of me, at the tables and in the small square area of sand, seemed to be Russian. The sandy area was marked with a red square just inside its border, and the people were playing an interesting sport in it. I listened to some of the women to the west of me speak Russian. They were sitting along the eastern and westerns sides of long tables, eating a meal. There seemed to be three or four tables running to the west. The grassy field to the north of the tent was raised slightly from the elevation of the tent. I looked to the east again to see that people were sitting around a gaming table. The middle-eastern people around the table were playing some kind of board game, and the russian people were playing in the field to the north. The long dinner tables now seemed to be to the west of the field, which seemed like the sand pit. I paced around this area, interested in what was happening and listening to the people speak their languages. I found everything very interesting. I then spotted a man who was sitting at the end of the table to the east of me. He had short white hair and was wearing a white button-up shirt. There seemed to be something special about him. I watched him with interest as a young child came up to him to say something. He spoke to the child for a moment before the child smiled and ran off to play. I realized that the white hair made him look older than he really was. He seemed to be about my age. He had a very attractive face, with smooth skin and a pale complexion. His cheeks were covered with light-toned freckles which made him seem more interesting. I said something to the people around me, trying to find out what was going on in this tent. I listened to them speak with russian accents and replied in English with a heavy irish accent. I then wondered why i had picked up an accent. I thought that it must have been in response to the accents i was hearing. I decided that i should not linger here, so i turned to the south and head back out of the tent. I was amazed with the people, and interested in the man at the table.

12004 October 27

I stood in front of the small stove. The white stove was to the southeast of me, and was set into the dark countertop of the kitchen. This place seemed to be my apartment. My mother moved to the southwest of me, along the counter. She was doing something as i cooked. I stirred something in the small metal sauce pan. I had said something about $F45, but my mother did not want to talk about him. I felt annoyed, but i was trying to tell my mother something about him, so i continued. She was unhappy with the conversation and started complaining. I decided to ignore her concerns and continue with what i was doing. I was now standing in front of a white sink which was set into the countertop to the east of me. I reached into the sink and picked up a small pink ceramic pot. It seemed like a flower pot, but it was oddly shaped. I had been cleaning it with the rest of the dishes, but it now caught my attention. I dumped the soapy water out of it and turned it over, trying to figure out what it was. I had vents around the bottom edge, and i thought that it was really a flower pot. The vents would let the water drain. Something seemed strange about it, though. As i rotated it, it seemed to be something else. I thought that it was really a tea pot, but then it seemed like a fancy pink bowl. Confused, i asked my mother where it came from.

I walked to the south, through the arched doorway and into the round stone room. The old walls of the room seemed crude and windowless, but there was another opening to the south which let in sunlight from outside. In the center of the room was a tall brass fountain. I walked toward it with $Z. It was shaped roughly like a man, though it was only a metre and a half tall. The brass man seemed to be wearing a hat, and there was a brass pole sticking out of the center of the hat. The pole extended over my head. It was the spray nozzle for the fountain. The man to the east of me then started describing the fountain to me. It was a very old fountain, and had been a part of this old building for a long time. I played with the tall pole which was on top of the fountain. I found that it could telescope up and down into the head of the brass statue. I pulled it up, noticing that it could be really tall if fully extended. I then pulled the head of the fountain all the way back down so that i could look in the top of it. I had been pulling on the head of the brass statue so that the head lifted up and down. I suddenly noticed that there was no water coming out of this fountain. I worried for a moment that i had broken this special fountain. As i pushed to top of the fountain all the way down, i noticed that there was no water building up in the shallow bowl at the top of the collapsing pole. I hoped that i did not break it. The man to the east continued to talk about the statue as i lifted lid from the top of the statue. The collapsing pole and fountain dish were attached to the center of the lid. I looked down into the center of the fountain, which now seemed like a shallow well. There were small holes around the bottom of the round container. The water was supposed to flow through these holes from the natural spring below. This place was special because of the spring water. I looked at the small holes and noticed that there was a slight white buildup around them. This must have been from the minerals in the water which were clogging the flow of water from the spring. Someone said that the fountain had not been cleaned in many years. I thought that this showed just how pure the water was. If it took that long for the mineral deposits to form, then the water must be very pure. I pulled up on the rim of the brass cylinder, lifting it back up to its regular height. I was pulling on the top of the head of the statue, which was now the statue of a kind. He had a crown around the top of his head and a crudely crafted face. This was the king who had the fountain built long ago. Someone said that the king never saw water come out of the fountain in his lifetime. The statue had been built, but the water flowed so slowly that it took time to fill up the base of the statue. The king died before water ever flowed out the top of the statue. I let go of the top of the head, but it collapsed back down, so i had to pull it up and steady it until i could get it to stay in its original position. I pulled up on the spout at the top of the head, trying to get it to say here it had been. I hoped that i did not mess it up.

I was sitting in the room with the other people. People were sitting around talking, as though this was a public bar. I started to talk, commenting on our political leaders. I felt as though what i had said happened to be eloquent. It sounded profound and accusatory. I was commenting against our leaders. The intellectual people in the room scoffed at the comment, as though they thought it was silly. I felt justified in what i said and just decided that the people in the room were avoiding the obvious subjects which i had brought up. I knew that our leaders were corrupt, but most people could not admit it publicly. The others started to talk against me, but there was one other person in the room who spoke out and echoed my comments. He started saying things similar to what i was thinking. I knew that he supported by view from the inside of the issues. I could hear the man’s voice, but i could not see him in the crowded room. I was now sitting to the north of a table, and i could hear the voice coming from the southwest of me. I leaned forward to see if i could catch a glimpse of him. I finally had to stand up to see over some of the other people in the room. The man was sitting on the western end of the southern side of a long wooden table in the southwest section of the room. He was very handsome, with short-cut light-blonde hair. He was wearing a white button-up shirt. He seemed young and quite attractive. I then realized that i recognized him. He was Hans Scholl. I realized the significance of having him support my views, but i knew that he was putting himself in danger by being so outspoken. I did not mind being in trouble, but i knew that his open views would get him killed. The woman with the braided blonde hair at the western end of his table put a hand on his shoulder. She was trying to stop him from saying too much. She was wearing a plain dress from the nineteen-fourties. I realized that she must be Han’s sister. She was Sophie Scholl.

12004 October 28

I looked out the window on the north of the house. I seemed to be in the dining room of my grandmother’s house, moving toward her back door. I could see the green grass of the back yard trough the glass of the door. Several small animals ran across the window, heading away from the house. I watched as rabbit hopped over the lawn, past the white rail fence, and into the green bushes along the northwestern side of the lawn. There seemed to be a forested hill beyond the bushes and trees. I felt concerned because all of the animals were running away. This was a warning that there was something bad about the situation here. I worried that something bad was going to happen. My mother walked up to the east of me, looking out the door. I wondered what had scared all of the animals. I then noticed the bird in the middle of the lawn, near the western edge of the white fence. It was not running away, and i thought that it might be injured. There was something making me nervous about the animal. Its feathers were mostly grey as it lifted its wings over its body. It looked as though it was floundering on the ground. I then saw it lift its long neck, which was tan. I could not make out the bird clearly because part of the fence or a patch of tall weeds seemed to be in my way. I moved toward it cautiously, heading over the grassy lawn. I looked at the neck of the creature as it extended it skyward again. I could see that it really was more of a bright red. As the animal moved around, i realized that it was not a bird at all. It was a large red lizard. I backed away, telling my relatives that it was a komodo dragon. I felt suddenly frightened of the animal, afraid that it would attack. I knew how aggressive they could be. I backed away a little as it rolled over on the grass to warm its stomach in the sun. I told my relatives that it was a very aggressive animal and that it might attack. I then watched the animal stretch like a cat in the sun. It was on the other side of the fence from us, so, when it realized us, it would be slow in attacking because it had to cross the fence. I hurried my grandmother back into the house, telling them of the danger. I had to get both my mother and my grandmother into the house where it was safe. I then heard the young boy behind me. He was standing by the fence. He was mad at the fence and started hitting it. I thought that the dragon might attack him, so i ran back out to the edge of the fence. I could not see where the dragon had gone. There was only a large hole on the other side of the end fence post where it had been. Several brightly coloured eggs were around the hole. The egg we had taken was from the lizard. I realized that it was mad at us only because we had taken its eggs. I dropped the red egg back into the hole, hoping that the lizard would not ignore it because it had the smell of a human on it.

12004 October 30

I was driving with my family, down the long dirt road, to the west. I remembered driving this road before. It seemed to lead to $P95, and i remembered traveling it to stop at some relatives’ house. My grandfather seemed to be driving the car, but he was unsure where he was going. I told him that the house was on the right, just after he entered town. He started to slow down, as though to make the right turn, but i told him that he would have to wait a little while. As we drove on, i looked out the front window from my position in the back seat. There was a large open area to the north of us which seemed to be a golf course. My mother was sitting in the passenger’s seat, in the front of the car. I told my grandfather that he would have to wait until after the golf course to turn into the house. As we drove down the road, though, we passed a few trees at the edge of the hilly golf course and i noticed a cemetery on the north side of the road. The land on the north side of the road now sloped upward, making a rounded hill right off the edge of the road. I could not see any tombstones in the cemetery, but i somehow new that the green grassy slope was a cemetery. There seemed to be a low stone wall running along the edge of the road where the cemetery hill met the road. I added “and the cemetery” to my previous comment about where to make the turn. I soon realized that the cemetery would end and we would still not be at the house. I looked at the houses on the side of the road and realized that we were still not in the town yet, which i had said that we needed to reach before we could make the turn. The road turned slightly to the northwest and started up a shallow hill toward a wooded area. There were several houses on either side of the road, but none of them seemed to be part of the town. There was a large tan house on the north side of the road just past the cemetery, and a yellow house to the south. There was another house on the south side of the road. I thought that this did not look like the town i had remembered entering when i came to this house before. The town was more developed then. We must not be to the town yet. I looked ahead at the approaching woods. They seemed to be dense green to the north of the road. I must have thought that this road was unexpectedly long the last time i traveled it. The road crested a hill just inside the woods, and i wondered whether the town was on the other side of the hill. Suddenly, we were in the town, and we were slowing to look at the houses on the north side of the road. It was dark now, and we were stopped in front of the large yellow house. I stood at the side of the road, watching the large trailer than my parents and i had brought being rolled into a spot in front of the house. Something felt wrong, and it seemed that other relatives would be here because of something bad. I was now standing in the room of the yellow house. I was visiting $F10 here. His parents were sitting in chairs at the north side of the room, and $A232 was sitting somewhere to the east of me. I said something to $F10, who was sulking in a lounge chair in the southwest corner of the room. Something bad had happened. I tried to ask $F10 what had happened, but i felt as though i had to avoid the subject. I did not want to make him too upset. I asked him something, but did not directly ask what was wrong. He mentioned the man named Anderson. I knew that Anderson had something to do with the problem. It seemed that these things happened down south, where $F10 lived. We were now at the house of $F10’s parents. I tried not to upset $F10, so i spoke to $A232 about something. We tried to make plans to do something. I asked her about doing something, but i was then aware that $F10 was upset by the topic. What i had said was somehow related to what had happened. I could not understand the connection and wanted to know what had happened to $F10, but i felt hesitant to ask. I asked $F10 anyway what had happened. He did not seem to want to discuss it, but seemed to want to be comforted. He stood up and started to the north. He seemed to have asked me to go into the other room with him so that we could speak. He motioned to the coffee table which was now on the south side of the room. I felt confused, thinking that the coffee table was in the way of us discussing the problem. I wondered if he expected to roughhouse in the room. I followed him to the small kitchen to the north. The walls were yellow. $F10’s parents were in the other room, talking to me. I still could not find out what had happened. I paced around on the lawn in front of the large yellow house, thinking of the camper which we had parked on the lawn. I thought that we should move it. I wanted to know what had happened to make $F10 so upset. I wanted to comfort him and make him feel better, but i could not figure what was going on. I wondered whether i should move the camper to a better spot on the lawn.

I told the other person about the swampland behind my parents’ house. I remembered the large fields to the west of my parents, along the road on the other side of the woods, where the back edge of the fields was covered with cat of nine tails and reeds. I explained how the land to the west of my parents’ house was boggy. I then wondered whether the field i was thinking of was really from a dream. I could not remember whether it was actually there or whether i had seen it in a dream. I tried to explain to the man about how the water to the west was trapped on the flat land. There was a stream to the west of my parents’ house, but it flowed from the north, from a pond. I started moving to the west, through the woods on the side of the road from my parents’ house. The grass was golden on the small hill leading up from the road, and the wide shallow ditch at the foot of the hill was filled with standing water. I knew that this water did not spread that far to the west, but i showed it to the man as an example of the swamp. I said that the water did not run to the creek because it was on the wrong side of the hill. It just collected here and soaked into the ground. We were then moving to the north, around the other side of the woods. There was a road heading north, and i looked to the east, toward the woods. There was a wide grassy field to the east which sloped downward to the woods. I was not sure if it was the same swampy field that i remembered from my dreams, but i tried to make it appear as though it was swampy. I spoke to the man, pointing out the water collecting in the filed. I then looked down and noticed that we were walking on a narrow dirt road. It seemed too narrow to be the main road, so i thought that it must be a driveway or farmer’s access road. It ran through the snow-covered dry grass of the field. I bent over to touch the frozen ground to make sure that the ice on the road was not covering the pavement of a real road. Assuring myself that it was simply a dirt path, i stood up and continued to move forward, to the southeast. I noticed that there was water flowing down the path, toward the back of the filed. I knew that this would help prove my point about the swampy ground because it showed a lot of water moving across the ground rather than toward the creek. I followed the drive, thinking that it probably ran to the east of the pond which started the creek and up to the house in the woods. I looked up at the treeless woods ahead of us and remembered that the house up here runs a few hunting cabins. The woods closed in on the road as we headed to the southeast. I could see the large white house to the east, but it seemed to be closed for the winter. There was a covering of snow on the ground all around. The house to the east was in a clearing, but the trees were cut only five metres from the house. I watched the house as we continued up the road. It was partially obscured by the leafless trees of a small patch of woods between the clearing and the road. The southern end of the lawn around the house seemed to be open to a large filed. I turned to the south to look down the road and noticed that the hillside was clear of trees. The ground was covered with grass to the east and rows of dry corn stalks to the west. There was standing water coming down the side of the slope on the western side of the hill, partially covering the roots of the corn plants. I wondered, for a moment, how the water stayed still if it was on a hill, but then decided that i should point out the water to the other person to show him that i was right; there really was swampy land behind my parents’ house. I was conscious that someone might be watching us from the house to the northeast, and i thought that we should continue to the south, over the hill and back to my parents’ house, but i did not want to get my feet wet in the cold water. I wondered how we could fly over the hill. I thought that we should have been flying all along. It would have been easier to see all the swampy water if we were in the air. I thought that i should be able to fly and then pictured the metal flying machine. It was a small narrow craft with flat sides which sloped together at the bottom. The top was wide and flat, and i knew that silvery wings could extend from the roof in semicircles. It was a special machine which used advanced technology to fly. It did not use the wings for lift. They were simply to allow better maneuverability. We were then flying in the machine, heading to the south. As we passed over the creek, the water below suddenly seemed like a river. I knew that we were traveling along the eastern side of the island. This was a special tourist island that we had been visiting. I flew the ship around the point on the southeastern side of the island and recognized the tall rock formation sticking out of the water. At first i was surprised by the tall butte-like formation which had rocks to the north and south of it, forming a small ridge. I thought that this rock formation should be the rock at the beach in Oregon, or just off of Diamond Head Volcano in Hawaii. But then i remembered that it was part of this island. I wondered for a moment if this wan Greece, but then i remembered that this was really Roma. I turned the ship to the west, flying along the southern coast of the land. We were on the remote eastern side of the land, but we would be coming to the central developed section of the island shortly. I knew that the airport was in the center of the island and i wondered whether we would be crossing into their airspace. I thought that the military jets would be out to meet us since we would appear as a foreign object on their radar. They might think that we were a missile or some other attack ship. I pictured the silver craft that we were in as i passed over the shore of the land, imagining that we could tell the fighter planes that we were looking for the airport. We could act like we were confused and hint that we were from the future. Then we could disappear in the middle of a sentence to make them think that all had returned back to normal.